Tuesday, December 30, 2008

3 Little Children........

3 Little children have lost their manners.........my oh my oh my
and when I put them in time out they ask..........why oh why oh why.

Dear little children your manners you must find
or perhaps Mommy will lose her mind.......
my oh my oh my.........

Please don't fight and please don't whine
for that sound goes straight up my spine
my oh my oh my............

I know the break is long and weary
and school is never dreary
my oh my oh my.......

but soon enough you'll be back to the grind
and begging for spare time to find
my oh my oh my...........

So off with your new hand held game
and no one but yourselves are to blame......
my oh my oh my............

What Mommy......off with our game.....how unfair..

Then you should have thought of that before you forgot how to share......
my oh my oh my.........

so my dear little children after time out
and your lengthy pout
my oh my oh my..........

we will have a meeting
and see if you can have a nicer greeting
my oh my oh my.....

For I will not spoil you my sweet little dears
so hear my plea and listen with your ears

bring back my sweet, obedient children quick quick quick
me oh me oh my........

yes it has been a challenging day. All kids......go through these days that test a mom's patience to the Nth degree. Today is one of those days and the only exception is Jennifer, the 2 year old straightened up her ways much sooner than my other two. So they are sitting in their rooms, not playing and thinking about their behavior. In about 10 minutes or so I will call them down and we will have a nice little talk about their unacceptable behavior. If it does not change then they will be "unplugged" and lose all electronic entertainment privileges. This works better than other discipline methods for now.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Goodbye toybox.........hello GoodWill

This week I will be cleaning out my children's toy boxes. I will have 2 boxes........one for trash and one for Good Will.

So all those Happy Meal toys.......will find a new home.

Broken toys with missing limbs or wheels will find the trash box.

Puzzles and games with missing pieces and parts....will be meeting Mr Trash man.

Outgrown dolls, duplicate teddy bears and unused, unloved critters will go to Goodwill to find some other little child who will give that doll, bear or critter the love it so richly deserves.

Those cars and trucks my darling son has so outgrown and never plays with any more will find parking in someone else's home.

I find each Christmas that through no help from us my children get blessed. Because of others, my children received a huge Christmas, blessings beyond belief and will be passing on their gently used things or things they do not need. I want to teach them that there are others out there with far less than they have.

However, in the choosing I will not allow them to only give away things that no one else would want. I want them to choose things that are in good condition but unused by them any more. I want them to realize they are blessed. While they do not have the things some of their other friends do they are far more blessed than they realize.

I hope this will curb the tendency of all children to get the "gimmee" disease. My children were very precious this year. They show thankfulness and gratitude for everything they received from socks and underwear to the surprise gift Mike's great Aunt and his cousin gave them.........BIKES! What a shocker when we found out they had purchased all 3 children a new bike. So yes, my children were blessed. My husband and I only bought them 1 toy each and spent all of 30 dollars on the 3 of them because that is all that was in the budget. But family and friends overwhelmingly came through for our kids. They were blessed beyond all that we could ever have imagined. I am overwhelmed and grateful. My husband and I did not exchange presents this year but watching my children be grateful and sweet over everything was a wonderful present.

God is good all the time. I am overwhelmed by the goodness of God down to the fact He gave my kids Christmas. Not a NEED but a blessing and even their most secret wishes for bikes were fulfilled. We told NO ONE they wanted bikes......but God......He knew......and He is better than any santa claus could ever be........because He is real and when He moves on the hearts of people to give it blesses the person that receives. I am in awe.

Not Me Monday

Okay I do not know how to save the Not Me Monday Icon or where to get it. I googled it and could not find it.

* It was most definitely NOT ME who has drank 3 Dr Pepper's today when I am supposed to be cutting back on sodas.

* It was not me who spent the day doing next to nothing when I should be getting Christmas stuff taken down.

* It is not me who is frustrated with potty training because it is not MY 2 year old who was doing well on the potty, got sick and now will have NOTHING to do with the potty.

* It is not my children who think mommy is a chief cook, cup washer, comedian, entertainer and problem solver all rolled into one. After all they can most assuredly handle disagreements on their own without calling each other twinkle berry heads (they dont know curse words or potty words..LOL).

* It is not me who can't seem to load my son's new computer game toys onto the computer. They are called funkeys and I surely can not be outwitted by a child's plaything.

* It is not me who wishes she could order out instead of cooking tonight cause I ALWAYS love to cook. (although I can't the budget will not allow take out).

* It is not me who gained almost all her recent lost weight back over the holidays because I most assuredly did not sit down and eat 6 Christmas cookies in a row. No that was NOT me.

* It is not me who had the bright idea to sprinkle glitter everywhere Christmas Eve, including on the children while they were sleeping, to make the magic of Christmas "sparkle". And it is NOT ME who is still vacuming up said glitter or STILL finding it in my children's hair despite washing their hair. It is not our house in which the "sparkle" of Christmas is going to be around for months to come. As glitter is not being found in ever crevice. After all who knew said glitter multiplies like bunnies.

* It is not me who is going to get up from here in search of yet another snack...this time on some delectable punch bowl cake I made for Christmas day...it is not me that is addicted to chocolate cake, strawberries, vanilla pudding and whipped cream all made into one utterly almost sinful dessert. NO that is not me that wants to eat that for supper.

* And it is finally, not me who will have spelling errors in this post because she can NOT figure out how to spell vaccum ...vaccuum....vacum....forget it....it isnt me anyway who can't spell....it is someone else.

New Year's Resolutions

I am not that good at making New Year's resolutions as I always fall way short. However, I do try to set goals for the coming year. Some I make, some not so much. But all of them are in regards to doing better and being a better wife, mom, Christian, etc.

This year my goals are:

To walk a deeper walk with my Lord

To lose 25 lbs.

To become more organized in my home.

To play more with the kids and eliminate MY time wasters.

To exercise daily.

To let the small stuff slide when it comes to my husband instead of getting annoyed.

To have more patience with the kids, after all they are just that...kids.

To work harder on some of the household things I have let slide.

To read more with the kids.

To have a family "date" night more often.

To have a couple "date" night even when it means we can't spend money.

As I strive for these goals, I realize I can do none of these in my own strength. But I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.

Today, I do not feel strong or equipped but that doesn't mean I am not. The enemy of our souls would have me be discourage and down-trodden. As I fight that mood, I am choosing during nap time to turn to the Word of God. I must find a way to have more time with my Lord. It is in those quiet times with my Lord I find solace and comfort regardless of what I face that day. As I begin my new year I do so with fresh desire to improve what needs improving and to listen to what my Lord is telling me I need to work on. God is faithful and we are all unfinished works in the Master's hands. So I submit to the potter for HIM to mold this clay into what HE wants.

Monday, December 22, 2008

The Meaning of Christmas

As we have prepared for Christmas, several events have me thinking about the meaning of Christmas. You hear people talking about the gifts, the company, the cooking and the cleaning in preparation for Christmas. It is hustle and bustle and making sure everyone has a present or a card or a cooked goody. We ALL get caught up in it. But the true meaning of Christmas is the birth of a baby. One small baby born in humble circumstances to a humble, pure woman whose espoused husband had to take on her "shame" and put aside the gossip of the day.

Several events have me thinking about this:

1. The Caylee Anthony case where a child's life was senselessly snuffed out for no reason. Where lies and innuendos are played over and over again in the media and theories are put out on every side. But NO ONE talks about what/who was taken. An innocent child died and was thrown away like yesterday's garbage. But surely in those last moments of her little life, the Lord Jesus took her by the hand and took her to the Promised Land. He held that baby in His arms and wiped away every tear. He explained to her the purpose of her life and how her story would touch others to make them realize how truly short life is and how we must TREASURE the gifts God has given us in our children. Why God allowed such horror we will never understand. But that little girl has a purpose. Her life was not wasted and God did not take her away. The hands of another human did. Like Cain and Abel the Lord cries out at this and He shed His precious blood for her murderer and for the pain of that little girl. He, the Master, took her pain and fear upon His back. He will explain it to Caylee as only HE can.

2. Yesterday, my husband received a call from one of his bosses. A co-worker who is approximately 38-40 years old had gone to church and come home. His family had gone out shopping and his 18 year old daughter was out with friends. The 18 year old came home and found the tread mill running and her father face down beside it, dead from a heart attack. It will not matter what gifts those children and the wife have under the tree, their very lives have been turned upside down. Yet in the grief is promise because this man knew the Lord as Savior. Their is a promise and a hope that all those who loved him will see him again because one baby....came to save the world. That family is walking through the valley but surely the Lord Jesus is carrying them.

3. A friend lost her mother just a few weeks ago. As she struggles this first Christmas without her mother the only wish she has is that she could have more time with her mother. She too has the hope of all Christians. However, that does not take away the pain. It does not take away the grief. Yet because one little baby, came to us, the King of Kings, Lord of Lord to bring "peace on earth and goodwill toward men" she can rest in the promises of her Savior to help her walk through the grief.

So as I ponder on these things it has me wondering about Mary. She KNEW what the angel Gabriel told her about the child conceived in her womb. She KNEW that this child was the Messiah. She faced ridicule and shame of others who did not believe her story. Joseph could have had her put away in the least. However, in that day adultery was a stoning offense. She would have been considered and adulteress because she was betrothed to Joseph. But because he listened to what he was told by the Lord's messenger he willingly took her as his wife and this child as his son. As Mary gazed into the face of her newborn son, she saw God's face. She held the Savior of the world lovingly as only a mother can. And she knew, she may not have fully understood but she knew. Had it not been for that lowly, humble birth, Jesus could not have said He understood our plight. He WILLINGLY chose to humble Himself for the sins of a world who did not care about God or anyone else for that matter. Jesus.....HE IS the true meaning of Christmas. He is the ONLY meaning of Christmas.

The tinsel, the presents, the pretty lights, and all those baked goods are nice. I am thankful we have that. Gathering with loved ones is beyond priceless. However, when we come together we need to celebrate JESUS. The ONE, the ONLY reason for Christmas. Our Lord came down to be "with us" so that we might LIVE. That is the meaning of Christmas and I am awed by my KING. Thank you JESUS for your GIFT because it is a gift that never wears out. It never gets old. It can't be purchased or sold. It can't be returned for a different gift. It is free for the taking to whosoever will come.

My God, my King, My Savior I adore you and I praise You for everything in my life. Apart from you I am nothing and can do nothing. YOU ARE MY REASON or everything.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Aunt Theresa and Hannah

For those of you who don't know...I am an identical twin. So the picture you see here is not of me and Hannah but of my sister and Hannah. Theresa came over to play with Hannah while Jennifer was napping and Christopher was at an after school activity. It made Hannah's day. It always astounds me how the simplest things please our children.

They do not need fancy presents and entertainment. All they really need and want from those who love them is a little time, a little listening and a little understanding. So here they are having a grand time playing with Hannah's littlest pet shop toys. The fact Theresa used your silly voices to make the little critters talk made it all the more special. I don't know if Theresa would be thrilled I put a picture up of her in a toboggan but:

Littlest pet shop toy: $14.00
time spent playing: 60 minutes
the joy she gave my Hannah: priceless.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Wordless Wednesday...well somewhat wordless

My dear little daughter deciding to throw a tantrum during Daddy's sermon cause I would not let her help. I had to go to a back room. LOL

Monday, December 15, 2008

Chocolate Snow Flake Cookies......toddler style

Chocolate Snowflake Cookies
Toddler Style

Prep time: 1 hour 30 min (ready in 2 hours 30 minutes)

Kitchen tip: To make snowflake holes with clean edges, hold the straw vertically and twist it slightly to make the openings.

1 cup sugar 2 ¾ cups all purpose flour
1 cup margarine or butter ½ cup unsweetened cocoa
softened ¾ teaspoon baking powder
¼ cup milk ¼ teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon vanilla drinking straw
1 egg 2 tablespoons powdered sugar (uh I used WAY MORE)

1. In large bowl, combine sugar and margarine; beat until light and fluffy. Add milk, vanilla and egg; blend well. Add flour, cocoa, baking powder and baking soda; mix well. Cover with plastic wrap; refrigerate 1 hour for easier handling. (be sure to take pictures of your flour and chocolate covered toddler who was helping you mix and who also tasted the dough).
2. Heat oven to 350 degrees F. On lightly floured surface, roll out 1/3 of dough at a time to 1/8 inch thickness. (Keep remaining dough refrigerated). Cut with floured 2 ½ inch star shaped cookie cutter. Using drinking straw, punch random holes in cutout stars. (mine were not so random cause it was easier since a 2 year old was helping). Place 2 inches apart on un-greased cookie sheets. (Be sure to keep telling your 2 year old NOT to touch the cookies).
3. Bake at 350 degrees F. for 8 to 11 minutes or until set. Immediately remove from cookie sheets. Cool 15 minutes or until completely cooled. Sprinkle with powdered sugar. (Be sure to get kisses from your powdered sugar covered toddler who is “helping” you sprinkle. Allow child to have at least one cookie before dinner since she helped so well.)
4. Remind you toddler that she can NOT lick the cookies because you are trying to make them as a gift.
5. Remove LICKED cookies and put them with family batch to keep. After all one can not send one’s buddy pre-licked cookies.
6. Have fun and eat them with lots of love and laughter.
7. Package cookies meant for gift after cooled and sprinkled in ziplock bag.
8. Hide bag from toddler because she wants ALL the cookies.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Only one of MY kids........(edited to add photos)

Okay is there a sign on me that says

Let Bizarre things happen to her children

We went out to play in the snow. About 1.5 inches...........not much but enough for a snow day only because the roads were frozen over with ice.

We came back in after 20-30 min....cause the kids were cold. We shed out shoes, socks and jackets. I had been in maybe 4-5 minutes and Hannah comes up to me and says look mama

Her feet and ankles were swollen and had HUGE hives....I mean HUGE! I called the nurse....and by the time they called back.(it takes them FOREVER to call back)..it had faded.....so nothing we can do. BUT allergic to cold? Who knew?

Like my son having sensory issues but now it ONLY effects his eating as he has gotten past the tactile issues. Yeah......strange but that is just the way it is.

oh and both the nurse and my mil asked

Did you put socks on them or just shoes?

UH DUH! IT was 27 degrees outside.......what do you think? duh! Of course I put socks on THEM.....HELLO.

but my in-laws are taking us to buy boots today and mittens..since we don't have any.......that is a blessing.......

Here is one photo....the white in the center of the red is all hive......and the ankle is swollen:


photo number 2:

you can see how swollen around the ankle bone it is. I have very petite, bony children...LOL. Usually.


more of the hives:

It looked much worse in person than these photos show.

I dont get it..........but then again.......it made for an interesting morning. And something I am going to have to discuss more in depth with the dr. I am keeping the photos to show the dr. So they will not think it is a figament of my imagination.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Dear Amy.....I must need remedial classes in comptuer technology

Ah Dear Amy over at the Monster Wrangler blog. I can not seem to access your blog. I have clicked your name, your blog and even googled for your blog. Alas, I can not get there as it keeps telling me the link is broken. I being not so technical savy do not know how to remedy the situation. You faithfully read my blog and I can not return the favor. Which brings to mind other things I do not know how to do in the land of blog land.

I can NOT make html code for eye popping backgrounds.

I can NOT seem to figure out how to use labels for my posts to attract readers.

I can NOT seem to figure out how to add gadgets appropriately.

I just now learned how to EDIT for spelling errors, which makes my blog more readable.

I just now learned not to write everything in 1 continuous paragraph. (You'd think I'd know that seeing as how English and such was my finest subject in school).

I can NOT get my pictures to post in the order I wish when uploading to blogger. It all pops up random.

So this technical misfit needs "Blogging for Dummies".

Ahh...but the joys found through writing in my blog are there despite my inept abilities with the computer.

At this rate Christopher and Hannah will be much more techno savy then me in just a couple of years, if they aren't already.

Pink Elephants in my kitchen

I am trying to commit, as much as possible with 3 kids needing attention; my first hours of the day to God. Seeing as how my brain is still stuck in neutral and on idle, it is not easy. Sleep deprivation tends to have me thinking pink elephants might really exist. Only my elephants are in the kitchen eating breakfast and have lots of needs. They need to get dressed, have teeth brushed, a diaper/pull up changed, a ride to school and much much more. I once said while attending Bible College that I was "sluffering" having lost the ability of speech after pulling an all-nighter to study for an exam and finish a term paper. Sluffering is the combination of the words suffering and sleep deprivation. It is a direct indication of just how much the lack of sleep has attacked you. Now, then, I only THOUGHT I knew what sleep deprivation was. Little did I know at the time.....that would seem like a minute lack of sleep in comparison to what I experienced after becoming a mom.

The pink elephants are calling again. One needs to potty, one needs his hair combed and one is dawdling at getting dressed. ......Now what was I saying.....

Oh, my brain desperately cries out for more quiet time with God. However, if I do actually get quiet time, chances are it will turn into naptime.......zzzzzzzzzzz.

Okay, I'm awake, I'm awake...sort of.

Dear Lord: Please be patient with me.

I am trying. I just have to take care of my pink elephants...although my son would not like being called pink......guess he will have to be my blue elephant. Once I get them taken care of I might actually be able
to "Be still and know that He is God". I know He is God but I mean......coming into commune with Him and knowing Him in His presence on a daily basis. But He is always here for me, even when my conversation with Him comes in disjointed starts and stops.

Well off to take 2 of my wee little elephants to school and hopefully the other elephant and I will be able to go to the grocery store and pick up some items. But that is dependent upon what Papa elephant says is in the bank account.

In the meantime, I am relying on the fact that He understands I am an unfinished work, someone who needs to grow in Him. His promise:

"The Lord will perfect that which concerns me; Your mercy, O Lord, endures forever, Do not forsake the works of Your hands." Psalm 138:8

In other words He is perfecting me. He understand me and His hands are working in my life. He sees my heart and my desire to have some time with Him.

Okay........the pink elephants and the blue one too are running amuck.....sigh

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Raise Your Hand

Come on raise your hand if you aren't the hallmark looking mom, the mom in the commercials...that perfect mom.........

Come on raise your hand

If sometimes being a Mom doesn't feel fun.
If sometimes you are so close to losing it you feel like a volcano about to erupt.
If sometimes you love your children but you don't like them very much cause all they do is fight. (okay I like them but not their behavior).
If sometimes you feel like the meanest mommy on the block.
If you wish you could escape for a weekend by yourself.....or even a potty time without company.
If thinking these thoughts gives you great guilt.
If you wanna do better but you blow it at least a few times a weak.
If you regret things you have said and have to apologize to your children.
If there are times you did not apologize and should have.
If sometimes you feel like a failure.
Raise you hand:

If you'd do it all over again in a heartbeat!
If you wouldn't trade the hard times for all the money in the world.
If you know this too shall pass.
If you know that mistakes are a part of motherhood.
If you know you can make a difference and erase mistakes if you admit them and work to do better.
If you know its okay to leave the dishes in the sink to dance with your toddler or color with you kids.
If weeping comes at night but joy comes in the morning.
If you know God is on your side even when it feels you are all alone.
If you know it isn't your strength but His strength that helps you soar.

I am hiding

I had a whole post I was going to write but have changed my mind because I do not think I can protect the innocent or keep the names and identity of those being unfair from being guessed. I have some readers that know far too much about family members that need to not know the family's dirty laundry. (Both immediate and not immediate family)

In airing the dirty laundry, I would "feel" better. I would get some sort of vindication/revenge/joy out of sticking it to the ones who have made me feel inadequate and as less than acceptable. What would I really win though? A fleeting feeling of joy that comes from the release of the vent.

I WANT to kick and scream and throw a tantrum.
I WANT to rant and rave and give some people what for in no uncertain terms.
I WANT to stick it to someone and let them feel what I feel for just ONE day.

what I will do is


I am hurt, I am angry and I feel like I never measure up. Yet to my Father in heaven, I am HIS child and HE will ALWAYS love me, warts and all.

I try to keep my warts, my ugliness and my need to get even hidden. But every once in a while, it creeps in. It threatens to strangle me. I am human despite the belief of some that I should always have it together and never get angry or upset. Despite the fact, I am supposedly super human I do have the need to whine on occasion or blow of some pent up steam.

Why is it not acceptable for a Mom to ever need a break? Why is it not acceptable to WANT some "me time". That is seen as selfish because a real wife and mom does not need that. A real wife and mom does not need to do anything but keep her family fed, house perfect and all in order.

No, I do not cast the blame for this feeling all on the strong shoulders of my husband cause the attitude comes for the most part outside this home. Yet it effects us. It effects the glasses through which my husband does view the world.

It does not come from just one place. The need for me to fit a certain criteria comes from many places. The roles I am supposed to be able to fill, today, feels impossible.

I am one woman, I can not do it all. I have feelings. Because I do not do things the way someone else might, does not make it wrong. I am tired and no one gets that.

In Psalm 27:5 it says "In the time of trouble He shall hide me in His pavilion; in the secret of His tabernacle shall He hide me".

Today I need to hide. I need to hide from the stress and the expectations that are impossible to meet. This may not be the exact trouble referred to in this verse. But my Father promised to take care of me. He did NOT promise my life would be easy. But He did promise to be HERE for me when I need Him. That being said......I have to go into the pavilion. I have to choose to go to HIM so HE can hide me. I can not stand outside the gates of the secret place expecting to be hidden when I will not even go in the door. So, it takes me trusting Him enough to walk in the door of the pavilion and letting HIM hide me. He is not going to pick me up and force me to take the gifts He is giving me for my comfort.

Some days my life is overwhelming and I can't seem to hold on. On those days.......I need to rely on HIM more. Some days, I am floating high and free. On those days......I still need to rely on HIM to be the wind beneath my wings.

So today.........I am choosing to HIDE.........hide in my Savior's love and comfort because I need HIM to cover me like the mother hen covers her chicks. Cause the storms are brewing yet again and I am to tired to face it alone.

Off to hide in the pavilion and surround myself with a blanket of prayer.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Our weekend Getting ready for Christmas

Since the girls are better and everyone was well, we went and had our annual santa picture done. This started a long time ago but especially once Mike worked for Walgreen's. Although we put emphasis on celebration of the Savior's birth, we do get our annual santa picture. Looking at the ones from the past, well it brings back so many memories. Our children have grown and not just in size. They have grown in faith and wisdom as well.

After that we did some errands, grocery shopping and running around. Then we came home and put up the decorations on our tree. It only had lights on it because the girls getting sick kind of put a stop to the decorating process.

Our family is ready for Christmas. The lights are hung, the decorations put on , and the Nativity Scene is in place. Christmas IS my favorite holiday. Without the birth of the Savior, there would be no story to tell. Because He had to choose to humble Himself as a baby in a manger so that He could be like us. Because He came, we have freedom.

My dream is to have one of those big manger scenes you can put up outside. I want the WORLD to know WHO we believe Christmas is about. Our small manger scene is needing an update. I am hoping that after Christmas I can find a new one on sale. I want one like I had as a child. We had a stable and all the animals were painted to look realistic. The baby was beautiful and removable. We never put the baby Jesus figuring in the manger until Christmas Eve. Then my sister and I tucked him in a kleenex so as to keep him warm. The wisemen and their camels started off across the room from the manger scene and we moved them closer.....and did not actually put them in the manger scene until just after Christmas our recognition that scripture shows.....the wisemen came later. Those memories are precious and I want to give my children those same memories.

We are trying to prepare our hearts for Christmas too. Giving thanks for our many blessings and celebrating that Jesus is the reason for the season. I have plans to have an activity each night from tonight forward that will prepare our hearts and minds for Christmas and the celebration of the King of King's birthday, the birth or our Savior and our Lord.

God is good and greatly to be praised.

Friday, December 5, 2008

TGIF photos........so glad this is over....and we are home

just a few pics......there were a couple more but blogger wouldn't cooperate so this is what I have.

They are finally feeling better and asked to eat today. They are still tired but well enough to play some. God is good.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Just Enough Grace......Indeed

Thanks Rebekah over at Sweet Tea with Lemons, I won this book by Heather Nations. The winning of this book could not have come at a better time!

Heather is a wonderful lady, who has fought the Goliath of cancer and won. Her outlook on life and strength, comes from her faith. Her blog can be found at
Red-Headed Rants and Rambles

The reason this came at such a good time because of the week I have had. As you know from my blog, the week before Thanksgiving Christopher was sick with a tummy virus. If only we had known, this was just a mere inkling of what we were about to face. He was quite ill but it was nothing compared to what my wee girls were about to be hit with.

On Sunday, after a couple of days of icky poops (for both girls) Hannah started puking. I went off to church and left my Mama with the girls so I could fulfill my nursery duties. She did NOT seem that ill at the time. Uh.......wrong! I came home to our roast in the crock pot and Hannah still being sick and not wanting to eat. She began to toss her cookies even more and could not hold down even ice chips. At 7 pm my husband and I made the decision for me to take her to the ER. She was that ill. She was not keeping anything down and becoming increasingly lethargic. Lethargic in a 5 year old is not a good thing. The ER at the children's hospital kept her for about 2 hours and gave her fluids and then released us with the regular

. keep fluids going
. follow up with dr if needed
. return if..........yadda yadda yadda.

Return.....yeah......little did I know how QUICK that return would be. I arrived home and settled Hannah on a blanket on the floor so as to be closer to a bathroom and not to wake up her sister. At about 10 pm, over the baby monitor, I hear it. a Cough and a strangling sound, yep, you guessed it, puking. Jennifer began throwing up. This continued every 10 minutes until 1 am when again we made the call something was drastically wrong and we could not wait until morning for the pediatrician. The baby was trembling when she tried to stand and could not hold her head up to throw up. Off I went back to ER a mere few hours since I had left. At the hospital they did blood work, hooked her up to an IV and gave her anti nausea meds. It took two pokes cause her veins were collapsing. Those meds did not work, she continued to toss her cookies. She did not even fight the insertion of the IV. She was admitted to the hospital. I stayed there with her until she was released on Tuesday at 6 pm. I knew Hannah was still having issues but did not know the extent of it until I arrived at my inlaws. I sat down to eat a bite of soup. Hannah began puking in earnest and had not kept anything all down. She almost fell over in the bucket she was so weak. My husband had called the dr at 2:30 pm for meds to stop her vomiting. He was told "she will be fine, just give her fluids and bring her in the morning at 10 am". Yeah......right.

So off I went BACK to the ER! Okay this is 3 trips to the ER and 1 admission now. I get to the ER, they are packed. We are placed in the over flow room and an IV is started on Hannah, blood is taken. (This was NOT done for Hannah on her previous ER trip) and meds given. She too, did not fight the IV. She cried but did not fight. She was so brave, adorably so. She was tossing her cookies while they were trying to insert it. Anyway they got it in and gave her meds. They asked me "do you want us to just tank her up and send her home or admit her". I told them I had no idea but I did not want a return trip as this was visit NUMBER 3 to the ER. I asked for what the blood work revealed.

Normal bicarbonate level in a child is apparently 18. At 15 they will keep the child in the ER and give them fluids and send them home. Hannah's level was 12! Yep 12! I said "ADMIT HER". We got an observation room and did not go to a pediatric floor like with Jennifer because there were no beds. She was released on Wednesday.

This morning, Jennifer tossed her cookies again. Quite honestly I was beyond the ability to comprehend this. I had scheduled a follow up appointment for 9:45. I pushed ice chips and sips of pedialyte and kept it down her but every time she coughed I feared it would start again. We made it to the appointment and they gave her a shot for nausea.

So we are home, the girls are weak, very weak. They are not eating but they are keeping fluids down.

So grace, yes I had enough this week to get me through each event. I had grace as tears rolled down my face on Tuesday night when I was taking Hannah back to the ER for her 2nd trip. I called friends for them to pray and they did.

I had grace when I watched my babies so weak from tossing their cookies they trembled and shook and could not stand. I had grace when I watched my girls basically completely out of it and not even waking to acknowledge vital signs and stuff being done to them. I had grace as I went through it alone because Mike needed to not only work but be with the other children. I had enough grace when sometime on Monday after being awake for some 30 plus hours I began tossing my cookies. Mike came to the hospital and sat by Jennifer's bedside and held her in the rocking chair while I slept for 2 hours. God moved and touched my body and the nausea and vomiting went away. I had grace through the many hours of little to no sleep and I had grace from my King when my dear sweet baby began tossing her cookies again this morning.

I fought the Goliath of FEAR! FEAR so pervasive my heart was racing because my children were so sick and kept being sick. They are recovering. Their weakness is hard for me to watch. But God's grace is here.

And now I will have grace to get my household back in order. Bless his heart my husband tried but he has had to work extra hours to make up for work missed on Tuesday when he had to go home to Hannah while I was at Children's with Jennifer.

So yes..........I had just enough grace to get me through the valley we were walking in. Some people have said "oh it is just a tummy virus"......yes but dehydration can KILL. And it was NOT their child who was too weak to hold up her head. It was not their baby screaming NO in terror as she felt yet another spasm of vomiting come over her. It was not their child who trembles when she walks cause she is so weak. BUT God gave me grace and we are home and my children albeit weak are on the mend. And I praise God for the days they keep me so busy I can't think. Because having them bouncing off the walls is 20 thousand times better than them being so listless and weak they can't function.

I praise God for healing and for the lessons I have learned through this. Be grateful for the little things. Be grateful when your child is well enough to get into stuff because when they aren't IT HURTS your heart in places you cant even fathom.

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Drug Induced Depression

Christopher has been on Singulair about 3 weeks. I have been noticing lately he was weepy, belligerent, argumentative, depressed, sad and just all around seemed to have lost his joy. He is a bubbly, bright joy filled child most of the time. But coinciding with the start of Singulair we have noticed a change in is behavior and mood. When he got this tummy virus we noticed he was not his normal take it like a trooper self and was not bouncing back easily. So I did some research.

It seems that in some children, this medication can cause

. stomach pain
. depression
. anxiety
. behavior changes
. mood changes
. and even suicidal thoughts (Christopher did not have this).

The effects worsen as the medication is taken on a daily basis. I can NOT imagine how depressed my child would have become had we not caught this. He was like he was in another world at times. We stopped the drug on Friday. We are already seeing a difference to a small degree and his tummy virus is leaving too. The mood has been a factor since BEFORE the tummy virus. His mood is better and his sparkle is beginning to come back.

I wish I had done some research on this medication when it was given. I don't think I'd have tried it had I known there are as many negative reports as there are out there. Many doctors do not acknowledge these side effects. Some do but I do not want to wait to have a doctor verify it. My son was so depressed he was crying at the smallest things. He looked sad. His body language was sad. It hurt to seem him so sad. I even asked his teacher last week was anyone bullying him or was anything happening. She said no. He was also having trouble focusing in school and on homework. Unusual for him. He loves school, not lately. So I am hoping this will be the factor. I do believe it will because as I said, I have already seen some change.

From my research, some families even had to get their children medicated/and or into counseling before they realized it was the singulair. They stopped the singulair and within days their children began to go back to how they were before the meds. Apparently id does not happen with every child. But for those it does happen to, it is awful.

I hope this was our answer. I am glad God gives us the Mommy gut feelings when something is wrong. In any case I am waiting to get my happy, go lucky little boy back to normal.

Oh and this medication can also lower ones resistance to illness and make it take longer to get better. So it also explains why Christopher has been so sick with the simple tummy flu......well it helps explain it.

Friday, November 28, 2008

It has been a long, LONG day

We ended up taking Christopher in to the doctor. Since last Friday, he has been throwing up and running fevers off and on. One day good and another not. Sometimes it was from hour to hour different. He looks very frail and is very tired. He has been crying in pain and having to run for the bathroom a lot! Yesterday, he could not eat barely a thing. Today the same. We took him in and they ordered an abdominal xray. Which praise God did turn out okay. IF he does not improve by Monday then we will take him back and have further testing. For now, I am trying to push fluids and per dr orders let him eat whatever he feels like he can eat. He was 35 or 36 lbs........at the dr's office he was 33 but that was fully clothed. He looks VERY frail and you can see his bones even more than normal. The quest for the xray was horrid. First we were sent to one place and unknown to the dr, they were closed. Then sent to another and they did not take our insurance. Finally sent to children's hospital's diagnostic imaging center in Nashville, 30-45 min away. It was stressful. The report was good but my son is still suffering.

Because of his severe allergies, we can not give him ensure or other nutrient rich formulas often given to children with weight issues. He also has oral sensory issues and when he is sick these become more pronounced from his fear of throwing up. The fight to keep him healthy is taxing at times. Because of his asthma and daily inhaled steroids meds his immune system tends to have to fight harder. Add in his poor diet due to allergies and sensory issues and it is a problem.

He asked for burger tonight and fries. He ate a small amount and now feels nauseous so I have to give the nausea meds.

We are believing God for a miracle. Right now his biggest need is getting over this virus. But we also need God to heal him from his oral sensory issues. His limited diet is a detriment to him, add in the severe food allergies and I am at my wits end. God alone can do this. My son looks like death warmed over. He is usually a very active, energetic joy filled boy. Right now he is just too tired and weak to do his usual antics. It makes me realize how many times lately, I tell him to hush or be still when all he is doing is being an 8 year old boy and right now I wish he had the energy for those usual antics.

I am trying to keep a record of what is going on with him and may blog from time to time as we wait for his miracle. As in the movie, Facing the Giants...........I am preparing for RAIN while my little boy fights his Goliaths.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Best EVER Turkey Recipes

Turkey Done Right, according to my children:

Christopher's Recipe:

Get an 18 inch 100 lb turkey
Put some seasonings, garlic and cheddar cheese on it.
Take it to Oma's and Opas
Cook @ 300 degrees for 8 hours.

Hannah's Recipe:

Get a 14 lb turkey
Put juice in it and brown seasoning
Put in the oven on 16 degrees.
Cook for 14 hours, 14 minutes and 14 seconds
Cook until brown
Take it to Oma's and Opa's and eat it.

Jennifer's Recipe:

Get a high turkey.
Put M&M's on it.
Cook it for 2 minutes on 8 minutes HOT.
Eat with Papa

There you have it folks the best turkey recipes known to man kind.

Now aren't we glad we left the cooking to the grown ups this year and are very THANKFUL the kids are NOT allowed to touch the oven.

Happy Thanksgiving! My pies are done, my cookies are done, my mac and cheese is done, my corn is done, my bread is done and we are about to take it all over to the in-laws for thanksgiving dinner. God is good all the time and all the time God is good.

Giving Thanks

Giving thanks for the Lord's abundant love
for a Savior sent from above.
Giving thanks for blessings untold
as His plans for our lives unfold.
Giving thanks for a God serving man
who seeks to fulfill God's plan.
Giving thanks for a sweet little boy
whose life sparkles with unbridled joy.
Giving thanks for a precious little girl
who lives live in a giggling whirl
Giving thinks for our baby girl so dear
who faces life with laughter and no fear.
We have shelter in which to live
food on our table, and so much love to give.
We may not have riches beyond compare
but we have abundant love and life to share.
We may not have worldy fame
but a Savior who always remains the same.
Our treasures are not of this earth
but brought by a Savior born of a humble birth.
Giving thanks should be done throughout the year
as we raise our praises for the King to hear.
My heart is overflowing with God's abundant grace
and I pray I will please Him as I run the race.
So to my Lord, my Master, King of my heart
thanks for so many blessings you lovingly impart.

Thelma S. November 27, 2008

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Does it all boil down to Family Time?

Mike works 3 jobs. Full time at the air center, part time at Walgreen's (two nights a week) and preaches Sunday mornings and Wednesday nights as interim pastor at a local church The kids and I attend a different church when I am working the nursery because it is a paid position. The church we go to also has programs for the kids to be involved in. The church Mike is filling in at has NO kids, no kids programs and all older congregants. We attend with Mike when I am not keeping the nursery on Sundays. Wednesday nights the kids have their clubs at church they attend.

So, that being said, Christopher has really not been wanting to go to school lately. Even today, although he was better, he did not want to go back. He was so hesitant about school; I asked him if anyone is bullying him. He denies it. He did not want to discuss what was bothering him. Finally, on the way to school he burst into tears and said

"I just want time with my family". His tears and sorrow were so real it was beyond description. He sobbed hard. I could not stop the car so we just talked. He said he does not get to be with us enough, which is true with the schedule. Mike when he is home 2 nights a week is tired and we have NOT been doing family time. Saturdays the only real day off, is filled with errands. So, can it all boil down to this? Christopher says what he misses most is time with Daddy. He feels like he never sees Daddy anymore.

We have let it slide, because the schedule is so tight, Mike has to prepare sermons and to be honest by the end of the day I am tired and have not been pushing the family time. We tend to turn on the TV. So, my solution is to change some things.

Tuesdays, starting today, we will turn OFF the TV before the kids bed time and do some fun family activities. We have not stopped praying with our children BUT we have not done real family time, sit down together, do something fun kind of family night in a long time. So, can it really all boil down to that?

I am going to find some way to bring Family Time back to my family. If it is effecting my son, then it is effecting the girls. Our family is the most important thing to me, besides my Lord. So, today I am going to plan a fun supper and games or activity for us all to do together. Then when the kids go to bed, Mike can work on whatever he needs to work on. Our KIDS must come first. As we all know, for the most part, keeping those priorities in check, falls to the wife.

Any one who has ideas or links for family fun at home and inexpensive post it in your reply.

I want to bring the smile back to my son's eyes.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Are they KIDDING me?

Okay, Jennifer has been on amoxicillin for an infection. On her 10th day I noticed she had some hives but did NOT think of it being connected to the amoxicilin. Then I gave her the dose and the hives increased! I called the dr today since they were not open on the weekend.

The nurse calls me back this evening right after 5 pm, too late for an appointment. I tell her what is going on and

she says "it can't be the amoxicillin since it did not happen when she first took it".

I explained it worsened after being given a dose AND the rash fades with benadryl but comes back when it is time for benadryl again.

Again she said, it could not be the amoxicillin. Now, I am the Mother of a severely allergic child.

I have seen hives. I KNOW an allergic rash when I see one! So now they want to see her. Okay, fine, but right now there is no rash so what am I supposed to show them. Well, I did take pictures but they do NOT show the whelts from the hives!

I googled, yes I know a dangerous thing but from what I can see; there are many children who do not react the first few days of treatment or even the first time they have the medication. Subsequent allergy reactions get worse! I have been dealing with my son's allergies since he was diagnosed at 12 months. Although I suspected them long before and no one would listen. I know from allergy doctors, that allergies can "hide" and then cause a reaction and that each additional exposure can be worse. I am not a dumb Mom. I am a Mommy who has been in the allergy trenches for a LONG time.

So why is it doctors (in this case the nurse) do NOT Listen to parents? This is not a viral rash, I have seen those as well. This was HIVES.......clear and simply HIVES. Hello....okay so I am steamed that they treated me like I am stupid.

okay I am done now. Oh and MY CHILD will NOT be getting any form of the cillin family from this day forward. What is it they want me to do? Give her the last dose and "see what happens" Not going to happen.

Okay this time, I mean it...I am done venting now.

Do you hear what I hear

....a splash, a splash, giggle, giggle , hand smacking.........coming from the bathroom? Do you hear what I hear? The sounds of mischief floating in the air?

It was the sound of a toddler playing in the commode! Yes, my dear darling 2 year old who was supposed to be USING the potty was playing instead. In the midst of Mommy business, I did not notice she was taking tooooooooooooo long. I go in, and she is drenched. Her hair and face are wet, her arms and her shirt. She was giggling with pure and utter glee not understanding the sheer gross factor. So I take her out, tell her no and clean her up. Sanitized those hands with purell type stuff(alcohol free) and give her a time out, more for my sanity than anything else.

Yes, toilets are attractive things to both dogs and toddlers. At least it had been flushed! And had been cleaned recently......., whew. I guess she can't go potty alone for now until the novelty wears off. She is doing well with the potty even for its intended purpose. So my advice: beware of splashes, giggles and the sounds of hands smacking coming from your bathroom. The hand smacking was wet hands hitting porcelain. It is quite a distinct sound.

And I can chalk this up to one of those stories I can laugh about for years and tell HER children one day. It may not be funny in the moment, but when you realize she doesn't know toilets are not water fountains to play in, then you can see the humor. I also figure it will make good black mail material one day when she is say........13.

And yes, even when my child plays int he toilet, I LOVE being a Mommy! Besides my children never cease to find a way to break up the hum drum chores of the day.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

I guess I was WRONG and now I feel awful

Okay, as you read from my post on Friday, my son, I THOUGHT was playing hooky. He really did have an amazing recovery after it was too late to take him to school. He looked and appeared well. Friday night, he complained a tiny bit that his stomach hurt but never said another thing. All day Saturday he was fine, UNTIL, like 2 in the afternoon. We were visiting his grandparents. He came downstairs where he had been playing games on their computer.

He said he was tired and crawled in my lap. He felt very hot, so I took his temperature, 100.8. This from a child who NEVER runs fever even with horrid ear infections, he never ran a fever. Then he takes of running to the bathroom and makes it to uh...do the poop thing. We come home, and he takes of to the bathroom and pukes. Take his temp as he is hotter, 101.8. He has puked some today and has really bad poopy issues but his fever is down. So I guess, he was getting sick on Friday.

Now, as a Mom, I feel horrid. I guess I really missed it on this one. His body reacts to illness by triggering his asthma. Now his breathing is restricted and his cough is tight. Sigh......and me, I am left feeling like a bad mom. I know we all make mistakes, but I did NOT believe my child. I disciplined him by making him stay in bed all day.

Sometimes you so wish your child came with a "check engine light". At least one that let you know what was wrong and if they were really sick or not. I am sure this will not be the last time, I misinterpret my child but I still feel awful for it.

So now, I pray, the other two do not get it and his asthma does not get worse.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Mother Letters

In surfing blog land, I ran across this. A man who is trying to give a non "money" purchased gift to his wife. He is compiling letters from mothers all over blog land to give to his wife at Christmas as a way of encouragement. What a beautiful thought. He realizes this job called motherhood, is a hard task and his gift of love is priceless.

Here is the link: http://www.motherletter.blogspot.com/

I have already sumitted my letter but here is what I have written:

Dear Mother

When the laundry is piling up and the dishes are never ending, hold on.

When you have more than one child puking and fevers are rising, hold on.

When you are at your lowest point, feeling as if you don't matter, hold on.

When you can't walk one more step, and there is no more left, hold on.

For times passes, children grow and you are stronger than you know.

In your children's eyes you do not have to be a super model or have riches untold. All you need is love. For your children think you are their hero. There is no one like Mom. Though at times they all seem to take you for granted, it is in the simple faith that Mommy will always do it we see trust. Trust that Mommy is always there, Mommy always listens, Mommy always prays, and Mommy always cares. Mommy's love will never fade.

For in your arms they learn that love forgives and keeps on loving no matter what they do. They learn so much from everything you give them. It does not have to come with fancy bows and ribbons are high costs, but the gifts you are giving them now is teaching them to store up their treasures in heavenly places.

It is from watching my son struggle to breathe during an asthma attack that I realized the connection between mother and child goes beyond description. We almost lost him that day and I felt the separation as his life was slipping away. It was by a sheer miracle my son survived. In telling him it was okay to let go and go to the Lord, I learned that sometimes a mother's love is so deep she'd rather let go than watch her child suffer one more second. So hold on, hold on to the gifts that God has placed in your little ones.

Even when we know we have made mistakes as a mother, our place in our children's eyes never fades. So hold on dear mother and know that everything you do matters. And the mistakes you make, that we all make.....or just that mistakes and they are overcome, but love, your love as a mother for your child will far outshine the mistakes. For when your children behold your face, to them you are the most beautiful creation upon the earth, because you are the first love they have ever known and the only earthly love that will endure for all eternity.

2nd grade "Monopoly"

It all started this morning when my son informed me he had diarrhea (sorry if TMI), a stomach ache, and felt nauseous. Now, me being the concerned mom I am, but yet not wanting him to miss yet another day of school had to think long and hard about what to do. I also had an obligation to keep the church nursery for Women's Bible Study at a local church. It is a paid position. Deciding I did not want to risk being in the middle of nursery duty and getting a call from the school to come pick up a puking child; I kept him home. My mother agreed to watch him and Jennifer for me. A little while later, as I was leaving to take Hannah to Pre-K, I noticed, a decidedly chipper and active 8 year old. I asked him how are you feeling? The change was like turning off a light switch. Almost worthy of an Oscar. I feel awful Mommy, got listless and a long sad face. He was barely able to hold his head up. KNOWING in my gut he was faking, I went ahead and took Hannah to school. I arrived back from the drop off to discover he is FINE and now wants to eat.

The little Mr. did not pass go, he did not collect the game boy, he ate some toast and drank some juice and went DIRECTLY to bed. After all if you have tummy ailments, you must be careful about what you eat. He had NO get out of bed free card regardless of the fact he was scheduled to spend the night with his grandparents on easy street, where he'd have gotten his favorite foods, lots of gummy bears and jello. Nope, he stayed in bed all day and was not allowed to watch tv or play his nintendo ds. Usually when he is really home sick, I let him do those things to help keep him sedate so he doesn't get his breathing out of whack. He did NOT get his planned overnight play fest at his grandparents home.

Today having been caught in his attempt to be "sick" he got the full treatment of what it is like to be "too sick" to go to school. If you are to sick to go to school, you are to sick for game boy, nintendo, the WII, TV etc. He was NOT happy. But I stuck to my guns and went on about my day.

When I arrived home from nursery duty. The little "bed ridden" child was fast asleep from sheer boredom. He swears up and down he will never do it again. He lost this wheelin and dealin attempt for more game time and went bankrupt. He had no collateral and no hidden perks. So his attempt to pull the wool over Mommy's eyes failed but a lesson was learned.

When you play sick, you do not get free parking in gamesville or TV land, you go directly to bed with no get out free card and you suffer the consequences of your lie.

Ahhhh yes, the tangled web they weave when they try to deceive only gets them caught in mess.

So as you can see, my child, Mr. Goody-goody two shoes can get into just as much mischief as the next guy. Although sometimes, I swear he is 8 going on 18.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Need prayer

Not going into details but I need prayer. God knows what it is about. He sees my heart. He knows my soul. He is the lifter of my head. Right now the storm clouds are huge and the wind is strong and the waves of despair threaten to sink me. But I am keeping my eyes on Jesus and holding on. He WILL get me through the storm. He WILL be my present help in time of need. He holds me in His arms safe and warm and protected, like a new lamb held in the arms of the shepherd. The circumstances do not matter, the Savior is the answer and I will hold on. God is able.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Cardboard testimonies

I have no words........to relay just how much seeing these has effected me.

What is your cardboard testimony?

Be sure you have tissues ready, you WILL BE blessed!

Cardboard Testimonies from College Park Church on Vimeo.

google carboard testimonies are look up on you tube.........there are too many to count

here is one more link:


My carboard testimony is below:

Given 0% chance to live at birth, doctors said I'd never amount to anything.

Living 100% for Jesus, happily married with 3 children of my own and a Pastor's wife.

What is YOUR cardboard testimony?

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Apology Letter

Yesterday, Christopher was being fresh and rude. He spoke very rudely to me. I sent him to his room to think about his behavior and away from the current family activity.

He comes to the bottom of the stairs and says to his baby sisteer "Jennifer, give this to mommy".

Here is what he gave me (side note he can spell better than what is in this letter but I guess he was feeling emotional. I will write it just as written.)

Dear Mom:

I am sory that I talked mean to you. I will by nice to you.

from: your son.

paper: Just a few cents.
pencil: 25 cents
aggravation level before letter: HIGH

Letter of apology: PRICELESS

level of aggravation after letter: Non existent.

I love it when your kids, think to apologize on their own and add a written record of that apology.

We hugged and kissed and all was well. God is so good to me. My kids, to me, are the best kids in the whole world.

Monday, November 17, 2008

Pre-K dropout? my chuckle of the day

This morning on the way to school, my Hannah informed me:

"Mommy I am done with Pre-K, I am ready for kindergarten cause I am FIVE"!.

She then went on to inform me that she wanted to be in Dougie's class (my sister's son) and she would sit in the front and Dougie could sit in the back so they would not get in trouble.

She also informed me that she would take her teachers Ms. Jamie and Ms. Shelley WITH her to Kindergarten.

I finally convinced her that since she WILL still be 5 when she starts kindergarten it will be okay to finish Pre-K.

My dear little Diva, thinks she has gone beyond the Pre-K set and is so ready for Kindergarten.

My children never cease to make my heart smile.

The Suggestion Box

I have been working and thinking and trying to come up with ideas to not only make things at home go better but to make my blog more readable, more interesting, more fun but at the same time promote my faith and passion for Christ. It isn't always easy to balance life, home, church, school and all the demands of life; much less a daily blog. So, I am inviting you to comment and list some of the ideas you have found that makes your blog work, be more readable, attract readers, etc.

Now if my children could put notes in the HOME Suggestion Box this is some of what they would list:

1. Cookies for breakfast-- although sometimes this would be good, it is NOT going to happen no matter how cute the face that asks.

2. 24/7 television access-- This will not be happening either as I do like my children's bright minds and creative imagination. Some tv, okay 24/7 of cartoons, Dora, the Doodle Bops, Caillou, Winnie the Pooh or even Veggie Tales.......I'd be insane.

3. Macdonald's for dinner every night-- first off I do NOT like fast food. Secondly, if my kids ate there every time they wanted, they'd be as round as they are high.

4. Spend hours on end in the bath-- While, I am so glad they love their baths, I like my children wrinkle free.

5. Play time with Mommy and Daddy ALL the time--Yes, I love playing with my children, however the house must be cleaned at some point and food must be cooked, so I need a bit of a break between play periods.

These are but a few of the "suggestions" that my children have for me.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Buttons, bows, arguements....Sunday morning INSANITY

It never fails, NEVER! Sunday mornings are chaos. It doesn't matter if I have everything ready and waiting. It doesn't matter if I have everything planned. Invariably something falls apart.

Arguments over who is sitting too close to whom.

Cries of "I don't want to wear that"



Not listening....

and the list goes on....

And for some reason breakfast never goes right either.

Today I was happy with the fact I was able to get our lunch in the crockpot and ready so it would be ready by the time we arrived home.

Today it was crock pot meatloaf, an egg-less recipe since Christopher cant have dairy. I substituted soy milk for the milk called for in the recipe and 1 shredded potato to replace the egg. It was actually pretty good! So all was not a failure.

I have told my children they are no longer allowed to watch cartoons on Sunday mornings while waiting for breakfast and such. From this point forward we will be playing praise and worship music for our entire Sunday mornings. I told my dear husband that perhaps, music would tame the savage beasts.

Our kids are good kids for the most part, but for whatever reason, Sundays are the worst day. We do not want our kids to ever think, Daddy and Mommy scold us/yell(which is the point they pushed to today) and then go to church and "put on their church faces, Daddy preaches and Mommy smiles and acts like all is well. I do NOT want them to think we are hypocrites. Their behavior today deserved a firm, raised voice, not perhaps yelling, but we too are human. We all have to work together to make Sunday mornings sane.

Our kids are just that, kids and just cause they are PK's (preacher's kids) does not mean they are perfect. But the reality is, they are held to a higher standard. We have to balance expectation and reality. I will not put undue expectation on our children, but I also will not tolerate behavior they KNOW is not acceptable.

I pray for God to give us wisdom in this journey called parenthood. And perhaps, next Sunday, we can get out of the door on time, no tears being shed, and no one having been placed in the time out chair before 9 am! That is my goal. Now I must go and prepare my Hannah's birthday party. Let's see, guests + sugar + presents + excitement of a 5 year old's birthday party = HYPED UP CHAOS. Hmmmm, I wonder how easy getting out of the house by 5:30 pm for church will be tonight? SIGH

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Stroll down Memory Lane

In Honor of my 200th post, I took a stroll down memory lane. I went back and read some of my blog entries. As I stroll back in time, I see so much of God's hand. Yes, there were stormy days and hours and sorrow. But on each horizon the ever shining hope in Christ Jesus that we would make it through each storm. I read back and see the birth of my children's faith. I see love unfolding and sorrows being healed. I see so much that God has brought us through. I see so much that the enemy meant for harm but that God used for good. My children have grown so much. My family has grown stronger and closer. We may not have much in regards to the world's view of wealth but in love, in hope, in faith, and in the things of our Lord we are rich beyond description. What God is doing and has done in our lives.........astounds me. My God is ever faithful, a very present help in time of need (that scripture is so true). Today, I am thankful. Thankful for the trials, thankful for the sorrow, thankful for the blessings and thankful for the joy. I sit in utter amazement at the magnificence of my Lord and I praise my God for all that He is and all that He is doing. I praise God for a family rooted and grounded in Christ Jesus our Lord. And I look forward to all that God has in store for us.

In the pictures over the last 200 posts, I see my children growing up. They grow so fast and leave little bits of their childhood behind for mommy to treasure. In those bits of childhood are precious pieces of who God has planned them to be. They are full of hope, promise and possibility. May our Lord of all keep me always mindful that even through the trials and storms, HE is the sunrise and sunset on the horizon. He is our hope and our strength. In HIM alone can I find everything I need for the past, present and future.

Saving Money

Ahhhhh what is that sound? The sound of money saved. Yesterday, was payday. We had a specific amount of money we could spend on groceries. The last two times I went grocery shopping, it was beyond stressful and I ended up OVER budget just to get the barest of essentials. Today, after hearing about it from friends, I tried Aldi grocery store. WOW! I saved probably at least half of what I'd have spent at Publix!. Also I then went on over to Krogers, because there were a few items Aldi did not have. I bought for the most part, store brands. Only on a couple of things did I stay true to my normal brand. Partly because of Christopher's allergies. However, for the most part I went with store brand and only bought what was on sale with my Kroger customer card. I SAVED again! So for this week, I came in 25$ UNDER budget. Can you hear me smiling over the net? I did a jig in the car driving home. My girls thought "Mommy has lost her mind". But Jennifer said "Way a go Mommy" and Hannah said "Wahoo". Mike is at the Junior Bible Quiz meet so was not home. I called him and left a message for him to call. When he called back and I told him how much I saved; you could hear the man beaming over the phone. I have plans to make my savings bigger next time. But if I keep up learning to save at this pace, we might make it after all. Saving money is not just something we want to do, it is imperative to our very surival in this economy. Being a SAHM has its drawbacks, but WHEN I learn how to save money here and there and cut coupons effectively, then I will feel like I am being that Prov. 31 Mommy. What a RUSH! Saving that much money was like, beyond explainable. As I learn I will try to post tips, now and then on what I am learning. Some, maybe most people already know, maybe not, but this is just me, learning to save money and what helped.

Today's tips"

1. Go early on Saturday if that is your shopping day. Most people sleep in.

2. Shop discount store, no frills store, Sam's club etc.

3. Buy store brands when possible.

4. Buy true to customer card and reap the savings.

5. Do not buy things you don't need; i.e. those cookies and deli foods that tried to tempt me.

6. EAT FIRST before shopping. Do NOT shop hungry. (Shopping hungry has always been dangerous for me).

7. Go to more than one store if necessary.

8. Buy according to your list and stick to it.

9. Buy larger quanties of meat and divide it up after you get home instead of individually.

10. My most important tip, PRAY before you go and ask God to help you be a good steweard of what He has given you and to find the best bargains. YES....God cares about this too.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Take a lot of love, a dash of creativity and a pinch of talent...

and you get a Barbie doll cake. I don't confess to being Ms Suzy Homemaker; Martha Stewart...I will NEVER be. But my dear daughter wanted a doll cake and a doll cake she will get. I followed a recipe I found online. I know NOW....after the fact I SHOULD have made two boxes of cake mix and not one (the recipe only called for one), but you live and learn. My daughter will be thrilled. Mind you, when you see the finished product, it may not be fancy, and it may not be beautiful, but it is made with LOTS and LOTS of love.

(why did my pictures post randomly instead of the order I tried to upload them in, just tried to edit....did not work)

First I cooked the cake in a mixing bowl. (It was two small to work properly, the cake that is, I should have used the two mixes). Then I hollowed out the center today and inserted barbie wrapped in plastic wrap. I also wrapped her hair while I was frosting it.

The picture of Hannah is with her preschool teachers. She inisted she needed a picture with them today. She also informed everyone, today is her birthday and she is "an American Girl". She says her dress is just like Kit Cartride in the American Girl movie.

Dear Hannah

5 years ago today, God blessed us with you. Our first born daughter, a dream fulfilled, promise of all the beauty you bring to our lives. From that very first day, you were our Princess in Training, our wee little Diva. You were such a good baby and easily pleased but when you got mad, watch out for the drama. My sweet Hannah Rose, you are still are wee little rosebud beginning to unfold. This year you have done so very much. You started preschool and took to it readily, easily and eagerly. You help your friends in class and obey your teachers. The biggest gift of all this year, you gave your heart to Jesus. You love your Lord Jesus and your prayers are so sweet. You always pray, unprompted, "For everyone to have joy". Your marathon prayers can sometimes make mommy and daddy have to hide their mouths to keep from laughing out loud. You have prayed for just about everything under the sun. Yet, to me that is so wonderful. You have learned, that you can take every care, every concern, every joy and every sorrow to Jesus. You have learned that Jesus cares about everything. You bring such joy to our lives. I watched you today as I took you to school, my big girl, skipping down the hallway greeting those around you. Your exuberance and dramatic flair are incredible. You made sure everyone, knew, you were dressed like "an American Girl". You want the dolls and when I said no, not yet you took it with grace. You are a loving, compassionate girl. You help take care of Christopher when he is sick and you are so tender with Jennifer. On those times you are naughty or do throw a dramatic tantrum, you are quick to repent and mend your ways. You are beautiful handiwork of God. Your big blues eyes sparkle like all the diamonds you want to wear, even if daddy says you are too young for diamonds. (besides they cost too much money, but you dont know that). Your one true love besides your Savior is your daddy! You my darling first born daughter make my heart SMILE. Happy Birthday Sweetie. May God continue the good work He has begun in you, for you truly are fearfully and wonderfully made.

Love Mommy and Daddy

Thursday, November 13, 2008

It's one of THOSE days

You know the kind, the sky is grey and drippy. The air is cool and damp and my mood is about the same. Yesterday, I got the bright idea to began a work out regimen. Good idea, wrong work out program for a "beginner". Supposedly, if one does the stretches, warm up and cool down one does not get sore. One did not tell my body that. My body, feels like I have been beaten. Today ahead of me, or so many tasks that must be done. This includes going to the grocery to pick up the ingredients to make a cake for a certain little girl who wants a "doll cake". My mother in law, has without intending to do so, started a new tradition. She had Christopher and us over on his birthday for dinner and I took a home made cake. Despite the fact we had already had his birthday party for which there was........yep a cake. So my Hannah, being all about fair play has NOT forgotten her brother recieved TWO cakes, one for his party and one on his actual day. This was not my idea. To keep the peace however, in my family, there will be two cakes.

My body is so sore, I can barely move. Add to that, the fact I am having a family party on Sunday with the cake I originally ordered. That being said, my inlaws are coming for coffee and cake. Now, my mother in law, can make Martha Stewart's home look like a pig sty. My home is not dirty, but it has that certain lived in appeal of a family with 3 young children. So, I being the good little Proverbs Mommy, want to bring honor on my dear husband's head, will need to get all of the house in law ready. That means chasing the wayward dust bunnies and froot loops down that have somehow wondered under the couch and behind the desk. I have no energy. Saturday is a full day for my husband and Christopher. Unless I want to do all this preparation on Saturday while my husband and son are at Junior Bible Quiz, I must knuckl down, put the old nose to the grind stone and get with it. However, the moody part of me, says "What does it matter, it is never good enough anyway". So I have to choose to rise above the feeling like the sky outside and push my aching 40 year old body to do what it does not want to do. Can deep housecleaning be counted as a workout?

God equips us for the work that He calls us to do. Yet sometimes I feel ill equippled for it. Everyone thinks Mommy/wife/daughter in law/cook/lawyer/... should always have it together with dinner on the table and makeup on the face and .... you know the drill. So do my expectation of what I need to do relfect what others think of me or what God has called me to? Too often I am more worried about what others think than what God thinks.

Add to my stress, the fact that we have NO money, well we might have 10 dollars in the bank. God is moving, I dont doubt that. He always provides, always has and always will. Yet sometimes, I find it hard to understand why we have to worry if we are going to have groceries, much less provide a special birthday for one of my children.

: we interrupt this post to bring you this bulletin: that was decidely strange as I was typing and blogger decided to post my thread before I was done. Okay back to your regular scheduled reading:

Today, I will have to cling to the scripture. Sometimes clingig is easier said than done. Kind of like those window clings my kids love that sometimes cling and sometimes well they half way cling and other times, they don't cling at all.

The scriptures I am clinging to today are all found in Phillipians 4:

Phillipians 4:6 " Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God"

Phillipians 4:13 " I can do everthing through Him who gives me strength".

Phillipans 4:19 "And my God will meet all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus"

All those scriptures require action on my part; faith, perseverance, trusting Him, having a thankful heart attitude, prayer, supplication, acting like I have the strength even before I feel it.

Now it comes to mind, it has been a while since I included scripture in a blog post, shame on me. Blogging for me is therapuetic, healing, sometimes just putting my prayers to my Lord down in a visual way. And thought sometimes I include scripture and sometimes I don't. I want this blog to bring Him glory and not just be a whine fest. After all, I detest whining and my kids get put in time out. But God has big shoulders I think He can handle me crying on them even when the problem is small in comparison to some of the things going on in the world today. Our problems, be they big or small are important to Him.

Okay, now off to grab the vacuum and the pledge and the step stool so I can actually reach the top of the book cases to dust. If I don't post tomorrow, you will know the Dust bunnies launched and all out attack and won and reinforcements need to be sent in.

p.s. It is amazing what difference a period can make at the end of a sentence. I just read my own post and was shocked at a couple of spots because the absence of a period lent a whole new meaning to what I was trying to say. That too is a lesson in our love for our Lord. Do we take time to make sure our words, actions and deeds bring glory to Him. Or do we rush through our time with Him, leaving our sentences to Him with no punctuation, no forethought of how we want to speak to Him? I am "preaching" to myself here. Okay off to fight some finger smudges on the windows, feed the baby girl her lunch and perhaps grab a bite myself.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

100 things about me

I was inspired by Rebekah over at Sweet tea with Lemon to do this. I never did celebrate my 100th post, which has come and gone. So I guess you might get to know a bit more about me than you ever thought you would.

1. I was born again when I was 6 years old. My twin and I walked the aisle hand in hand to accept Jesus as our Savior.

2. I was born in 1968 but most of my memories are from the 80's including the neon colors, leg warmers and BIG, no I mean GIANT hair.

3. I knew at 12 years old the Lord had called me to ministry as a pastor's wife.

4. A very precious pastor's wife saved my life from the devastating grips of anorexia, simply by caring enough to see the problem and ask me daily was I trying to get out of it, prayer and friendly counsel. Although at that time, I did not realize she was "counseling" me.

5. My twin and I went our separate ways for college. She went to the University of Florida and I went to what was then Southeastern Bible College (it is now a university).

6. I did NOT meet my preacher charming at SEC, although I was sure I would.

7. I lived with my sister for several years after college before she got married (the jerk since left her simply because she wanted to live for Jesus and he didn't anymore).

8. In 1995?, I "met" this dude on line. He was nice, we chatted and chatted some more then we started calling each other.......well the rest is history.

9. I met my intended in 1997 for the first time in person. The minute I opened the door, God spoke to my heart and said "This is your husband". I thought, God, your nuts, one does not marry the man she met on the internet. But that's all she wrote.

10. I worked for the State of Florida for many years and soon lost my view of the world through rose colored glasses. I found out what people will do to their kids for reasons only God can understand and went through a deep depression. God rescued me out of that depression, through medication (gasp), Christian counseling and lots and lots of prayer.

11. I received my Master's degree in Social Work in August of 1999.

12. October 9, 1999 I married my "internet dude" we had dated over the phone and the internet and flew back and forth from FL to NY to spend time together. I stayed at his parents, he stayed at my dad's etc. So after marriage, this FL girl moved lock stock and barrel to Long Island, NY.

13. In December 1999 I had surgery for severe, fertility threatening endometriosis.

14. On October 21, 2000 our first son was born. From the beginning his life would prove to have many challenges which he has faced like little David against Goliath.

15. My husband was away from us for 9 months due to a much needed training program preparing him for ministry. It was the hardest 9 months of our lives. My son was 5 months old when he left. I raised my son alone for the most part during that time. But my husband came back a different man. Much worth the investment and ready to see what God had in store for us.

16. Our son was continuing to have major health issues, could not tolerate foods and formula well and at 11 months had been sick more than he had been well.

17. On September 11, 2001, I stood in the WIC office getting my son's special formula as I watched horror unfold. The mood on Long Island, NY was so pervasive you could not breathe. Later that day, we learned that my husband's cousin (my husband was not yet home from KY at this time) who was a NYFD paramedic was killed when the towers came down.

18. On October 21, 2001 we celebrated Christopher's first birthday. That also was the day of my son's first asthma attack. A day that would prove just a taste of the many things we would face.

19. A few weeks later, our son was diagnosed with severe, life threatening allergies, to milk, eggs and peanuts. All things he had been getting in foods unknown to us because we did not know how to read labels.

20. In December 2001, one of the hardest days of my life occurred. We rushed Christopher to the hospital in full blown asthma attack. He was admitted with a pulse oxygen rate of 81 while on oxygen. My son, my sweet little son was no longer able to play, although he tried and he was grey. That day, I almost lost my first born child. As he lay in my arms hooked up to oxygen and monitors, God said "Give him to me". I said but God you gave him to me. God said "Give him to me". I said, Okay, God he is yours, I want my baby but if you want him take him home, just don't let him suffer. I leaned over, tears running down my face and whispered, "Son, I love you, Daddy loves, but Jesus loves you more. If it is too hard and you hurt too much and Jesus calls you home, go to Him. He will take care of you" I leaned back up and begin to rock and sing "Jesus loves me this I know". At that moment, my son began his slow ascent up the rock slope of recovery. He has faced many asthma attacks. He has looked death in the face many times since then but that day, was my Abraham experience. Would I trust God enough to let go, or would I hold onto the gifts that God had given and not share them.

21. In Feburary 2002 my son accidentely poured a glass of milk over his head. Immediately he began to react. I thought he could not reach the milk. He showed me to never underetimate a toddler. Every where the milk touched he looked scalded. The milk that ran into his mouth began to close his airway as he simultaneously tried to puke. The eye the milk ran into was th size of a golf ball. I called 911 and administered the epi pen. Hours later after IV benadryl, steroids and scripts for more steroids we were released. I was shaken to my core.

22. In Fall of 2002 my son was diagnosed with oral sensory issues. Go figure for the first year of his life every time he ate, he hurt because drs would not listen that something was wrong with my baby. Undiagnosed food allergies taught him, eating is painful. He began getting Occupational therapy.

23. In January of 2003 we were preparing to leave NY so Mike could attend Bible school for pastoral ministry. The trip was delayed somewhat. Christopher had tubes put in his ears and we ALL had the Norwalk Virus. Little did we know how that virus would effect our lives.

24. In Feburary of 2003 Mike and I were given an overnight trip to a bed and breakfast. Little did we know that 9 months later our real souveneir would arrive.

25. About this time, we noticed a lump on my husband's neck growing like crazy. My husband being the brave man that is and macho, did NOT want to go to the dr. Myself and his parents insisted. That led to a biopsy which led to surgery. I was sitting in the lobby when the call came waiting to here from the surgeon. I picked up the phone, "Mrs. S. Its cancer" Words that forever scarred my brain. He did say if you gotta have cancer its the best one to have. WHAT? His cancer was fast growing, had we not had it taken care of when we did, it would have metastasised. Only weeks after the viral illness turned on so to speak his cancer (what drs surmise) it was already 1 percent into lymph nodes. Had it encroached much more, the battle would have been harder.

26. After just recieving a positive pregnancy test my husband had a radio active iodine treatment. I was pregnant, he was radio active.......yeah we spent some time apart.

27. Finally in the end of May 2003, we moved ourselves to Florida. Our son was 2.5, I was about 12 weeks pregnant and had morning sickness, Mike drove the truck, I drove our car. It was a HARD trip.

28. We arrived in Lakeland, Florida and began our new lives and Mike began Bible college and worked full time at night.

29. On November 14, 2003, our little souveneir was born. Hannah. She was a little Diva from birth.

30. Life was difficult but we were making it. I learned that I could be a stay at home mom and juggle two children and husband gone so much we were like ships in the night.

31. In September 05, I had a miscarriage. I was devastated. Little did I know what we were about to face.

32. In early October, Christopher had an asthma attack and collapsed in my arms. I called my husband who raced home from school. We rushed him to the hospital. At the ER he was in SEVERE respiratory distress. Oxygen levels in the low 80s with O2. They asked us about his allergies, we told them. They gave him a treatment and he seemed to rally. A few hours later they came in with another treatment and said we are going to give him Atrovent. We did NOT know to ask about it. They decided to admit him because on high levels of O2 he was barely at 80 and not maintaining between treatments. On the floor, I noticed his face and all extremities were SCARLET RED and he was no longer talking or moving much, I said is that normal? They said what, he doesn't have a fever, I said no. They asked what he had in ER. I said Atrovent. The respiratory therapist said Uh, isn't he allergic to peanuts. I said Yes, why. He said Maa'm they aren't supposed to give kids with peanut allergy atrovent. Before my very eyes my son was crashing. He was admitted to intensive care on a continuous neb just shy of being intubated after steroids and IV benadryl. He was in intensive care 4 days, due to a medical mistake. That day we learned to ASK lots of questions when your child is given meds.

33. I ramble to much this is going to be a long READ sorry,

34. Was the above cheating, perhaps but I couldn't think at the moment and my dear daugher needed me to help her with the potty.

35. In November, we found out baby number 3 was on the way. We were not expecting to get pregnant so soon after a miscarriage.

36. My husband graduated from Southeastern University in May 2003

37. In June 2003 my husband recieved his licensure from the Assemblies of God as a licensed minister.

38. July 8th 2006 Jennifer was born.

39. In November 2006 we received our first position as associate pastor so we moved.

40. In July 2007, my husband was informed by the Senior pastor, it just "wasn't working out". My husband did nothing wrong but we were dismissed. There is a thread about it in my archives. We had 2 months to move.

41. In August 2007 we arrived in TN. We moved in 2 doors down from my twin sister.

42. Pretty much that is our life up to the present. Mike is an interim pastor at a small church here.

43. I am a sahm and keep the nursery at our church we are members at while Mike is interim pastor at a different church. It is a paid position, which we need right now. If we are given this church we will make the full move.

44. Mike preaches on Sunday mornings and Wendesday nights.

45. I can pick up things with my toes and write with my toes.

46. Barring a miracle we will have no other children. I made a wrong choice, thinking it was the right one and had my tubes tied. But in all things God is KING.

47. We struggle financially but I will not leave my children to go to work.

48. I am 20+ pounds overweight. My sister is a peanut. We are twins, people make rude comments. I am now trying to lose weight.

49. My 2 oldest children have asked Jesus in their hearts. We are nourishing what God has started and letting God lead them in a deeper walk as they grow,

50. I often fear I am not good enough to be a pastor's wife but God quickly puts me back on course.

51. My husband and my children are my joy.

52. I want to be a more organized homemaker but am organazationally challenged.

53. My inlaws moved to TN to be near us. This is both good and bad. (see archives).

54. I must have coffee in the mornings but this did not start til I craved coffee during my 2nd pregnancy.

55. I secretly dream and pray for a miracle of having another baby.

56. My husband is silly and nutty and makes my life wonderful.

57. My son has greater faith in his little finger than most adults. He talks to God and I have seen him try and "hear God". (see archives). He lays hands on people and headaches go away.

58. My middle daughter is truly a girly girl. She is full of sparkles and sunshine but also can turn to a mood on a seconds notice.

59. My baby daughter is our comedianne. Always happy, always full of joy. Eager to please, eager to help.

60. I have learned more about God the Father by being a parent than I ever knew possible.

62. My son just read a whole chapter book and said "Mommy, my head is so full my brain hurts". He cracks me up.

63. I have to go change a pull up, my baby daughter decided "I too tired for potty mommy".

64. I too often fall short of God's glory in spending time reading His word and talking to Him. I am working on it.

65. I miss Florida winters.

66. My dream vacation spot is the beach for a week with my family in a cabin on a secluded beach. Yeah, I said it was dream.

67. I have 1000s of pictures of my children on CD/dvd thingies but have not had any printed.

68. I tend to procrastinate too often.

69. I am horrid at math and when I try to help my son with addition, subtraction etc, I have to use my fingers. Sad, sad, sad.

70. We live in an apartment, I wish we lived in a house.

71. I held resentment for a long time against the Senior Pastor that dismissed my husband. Now, although what happened was unfair, I have forgiven and can see God's hand in it.

72. We are believing for a miracle for our son's healing for asthma, allergies and sensory issues.

73. I love chocolate but it is way too fattening, now I am going to eat my slice of chocolate cake after the kids go to bed and undo my work out.

74. All my children were C-sections, after the first one.

75. My first labor was 28 hours long, with a failed epidural and preeclampsia and having to be put under half way through the c section because I started feeling it.

76. Sometimes I wonder why I say/write the things that I do.

77. My dream is to be an author.

78. I seriously need a hair cut, but we can't afford it right now.

79. 100 things about yourself is harder than it looks and my life is not that exciting.

80. I waited for a long train to pass, while in labor with my last child. It was not fun. She decided to come BEFORE her scheduled c section.

81. I was given a 0% chance of survival at birth, good thing God doesn't take chances, He gives chances.

82. Doctors said I would be "retarded", would never graduate high school or amount to much.

83. The thing I most like about Fall in TN is the incredible colors on the trees. You do not get this beauty in Florida. It is beyond description.

84. I belong to like 6 or more message boards but only frequent 4.

85. I have blue eyes.....yes I am grasping at the moment.

86. My son says the best magic is the magic of family. We dont teach them about magic but this is what he just came up and told me.

87. My 4 year old (well 5 on Friday) who is shy for the most part, took to preschool like a duck to water and I am so proud of her.

88. I realize I talk about my family as if they are me, when describing me, but that is so true, they are a part of me.

89. I often feel like a failure as a wife and mother. God's still working on me.

90. God has blessed me in more ways than I can ever count.

91. Contrary to my children's belief I do not have super hearing BUT my ears are very sensitive to sounds and irritating noises that do NOT bother most people.

92. My children are very petite like me and I worry that my son especially will fall prey to bullies. I spend lots of time in prayer over this one.

93. I just lost it with my daughter Hannah, because she held the bathroom door shut while her baby sister was screaming....NO NO NO. I hate when I lose it. I feel bad, guilty you name it. I should have walked away, but I reacted.

94. I must, must have a glass of milk before I go to sleep at night or I can't sleep.

95. If I could change one thing about me, I'd be more patient in those moments like I mentioned in 93.

96. I should be doing any number of things instead of sitting here at the computer.

97. I second guess myself all the time, despite me knowing I have the ability to make good decisions.

98. I know God has equipped me but too often doubt that and try to do it by myself.

99. I wonder if years down the road my children will be glad I blogged about their childhood or embarrassed.

100. I love my Lord Jesus Christ with all my heart and soul.