Tuesday, December 30, 2008

3 Little Children........

3 Little children have lost their manners.........my oh my oh my
and when I put them in time out they ask..........why oh why oh why.

Dear little children your manners you must find
or perhaps Mommy will lose her mind.......
my oh my oh my.........

Please don't fight and please don't whine
for that sound goes straight up my spine
my oh my oh my............

I know the break is long and weary
and school is never dreary
my oh my oh my.......

but soon enough you'll be back to the grind
and begging for spare time to find
my oh my oh my...........

So off with your new hand held game
and no one but yourselves are to blame......
my oh my oh my............

What Mommy......off with our game.....how unfair..

Then you should have thought of that before you forgot how to share......
my oh my oh my.........

so my dear little children after time out
and your lengthy pout
my oh my oh my..........

we will have a meeting
and see if you can have a nicer greeting
my oh my oh my.....

For I will not spoil you my sweet little dears
so hear my plea and listen with your ears

bring back my sweet, obedient children quick quick quick
me oh me oh my........

yes it has been a challenging day. All kids......go through these days that test a mom's patience to the Nth degree. Today is one of those days and the only exception is Jennifer, the 2 year old straightened up her ways much sooner than my other two. So they are sitting in their rooms, not playing and thinking about their behavior. In about 10 minutes or so I will call them down and we will have a nice little talk about their unacceptable behavior. If it does not change then they will be "unplugged" and lose all electronic entertainment privileges. This works better than other discipline methods for now.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Goodbye toybox.........hello GoodWill

This week I will be cleaning out my children's toy boxes. I will have 2 boxes........one for trash and one for Good Will.

So all those Happy Meal toys.......will find a new home.

Broken toys with missing limbs or wheels will find the trash box.

Puzzles and games with missing pieces and parts....will be meeting Mr Trash man.

Outgrown dolls, duplicate teddy bears and unused, unloved critters will go to Goodwill to find some other little child who will give that doll, bear or critter the love it so richly deserves.

Those cars and trucks my darling son has so outgrown and never plays with any more will find parking in someone else's home.

I find each Christmas that through no help from us my children get blessed. Because of others, my children received a huge Christmas, blessings beyond belief and will be passing on their gently used things or things they do not need. I want to teach them that there are others out there with far less than they have.

However, in the choosing I will not allow them to only give away things that no one else would want. I want them to choose things that are in good condition but unused by them any more. I want them to realize they are blessed. While they do not have the things some of their other friends do they are far more blessed than they realize.

I hope this will curb the tendency of all children to get the "gimmee" disease. My children were very precious this year. They show thankfulness and gratitude for everything they received from socks and underwear to the surprise gift Mike's great Aunt and his cousin gave them.........BIKES! What a shocker when we found out they had purchased all 3 children a new bike. So yes, my children were blessed. My husband and I only bought them 1 toy each and spent all of 30 dollars on the 3 of them because that is all that was in the budget. But family and friends overwhelmingly came through for our kids. They were blessed beyond all that we could ever have imagined. I am overwhelmed and grateful. My husband and I did not exchange presents this year but watching my children be grateful and sweet over everything was a wonderful present.

God is good all the time. I am overwhelmed by the goodness of God down to the fact He gave my kids Christmas. Not a NEED but a blessing and even their most secret wishes for bikes were fulfilled. We told NO ONE they wanted bikes......but God......He knew......and He is better than any santa claus could ever be........because He is real and when He moves on the hearts of people to give it blesses the person that receives. I am in awe.

Not Me Monday

Okay I do not know how to save the Not Me Monday Icon or where to get it. I googled it and could not find it.

* It was most definitely NOT ME who has drank 3 Dr Pepper's today when I am supposed to be cutting back on sodas.

* It was not me who spent the day doing next to nothing when I should be getting Christmas stuff taken down.

* It is not me who is frustrated with potty training because it is not MY 2 year old who was doing well on the potty, got sick and now will have NOTHING to do with the potty.

* It is not my children who think mommy is a chief cook, cup washer, comedian, entertainer and problem solver all rolled into one. After all they can most assuredly handle disagreements on their own without calling each other twinkle berry heads (they dont know curse words or potty words..LOL).

* It is not me who can't seem to load my son's new computer game toys onto the computer. They are called funkeys and I surely can not be outwitted by a child's plaything.

* It is not me who wishes she could order out instead of cooking tonight cause I ALWAYS love to cook. (although I can't the budget will not allow take out).

* It is not me who gained almost all her recent lost weight back over the holidays because I most assuredly did not sit down and eat 6 Christmas cookies in a row. No that was NOT me.

* It is not me who had the bright idea to sprinkle glitter everywhere Christmas Eve, including on the children while they were sleeping, to make the magic of Christmas "sparkle". And it is NOT ME who is still vacuming up said glitter or STILL finding it in my children's hair despite washing their hair. It is not our house in which the "sparkle" of Christmas is going to be around for months to come. As glitter is not being found in ever crevice. After all who knew said glitter multiplies like bunnies.

* It is not me who is going to get up from here in search of yet another snack...this time on some delectable punch bowl cake I made for Christmas day...it is not me that is addicted to chocolate cake, strawberries, vanilla pudding and whipped cream all made into one utterly almost sinful dessert. NO that is not me that wants to eat that for supper.

* And it is finally, not me who will have spelling errors in this post because she can NOT figure out how to spell vaccum ...vaccuum....vacum....forget it....it isnt me anyway who can't spell....it is someone else.

New Year's Resolutions

I am not that good at making New Year's resolutions as I always fall way short. However, I do try to set goals for the coming year. Some I make, some not so much. But all of them are in regards to doing better and being a better wife, mom, Christian, etc.

This year my goals are:

To walk a deeper walk with my Lord

To lose 25 lbs.

To become more organized in my home.

To play more with the kids and eliminate MY time wasters.

To exercise daily.

To let the small stuff slide when it comes to my husband instead of getting annoyed.

To have more patience with the kids, after all they are just that...kids.

To work harder on some of the household things I have let slide.

To read more with the kids.

To have a family "date" night more often.

To have a couple "date" night even when it means we can't spend money.

As I strive for these goals, I realize I can do none of these in my own strength. But I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.

Today, I do not feel strong or equipped but that doesn't mean I am not. The enemy of our souls would have me be discourage and down-trodden. As I fight that mood, I am choosing during nap time to turn to the Word of God. I must find a way to have more time with my Lord. It is in those quiet times with my Lord I find solace and comfort regardless of what I face that day. As I begin my new year I do so with fresh desire to improve what needs improving and to listen to what my Lord is telling me I need to work on. God is faithful and we are all unfinished works in the Master's hands. So I submit to the potter for HIM to mold this clay into what HE wants.

Monday, December 22, 2008

The Meaning of Christmas

As we have prepared for Christmas, several events have me thinking about the meaning of Christmas. You hear people talking about the gifts, the company, the cooking and the cleaning in preparation for Christmas. It is hustle and bustle and making sure everyone has a present or a card or a cooked goody. We ALL get caught up in it. But the true meaning of Christmas is the birth of a baby. One small baby born in humble circumstances to a humble, pure woman whose espoused husband had to take on her "shame" and put aside the gossip of the day.

Several events have me thinking about this:

1. The Caylee Anthony case where a child's life was senselessly snuffed out for no reason. Where lies and innuendos are played over and over again in the media and theories are put out on every side. But NO ONE talks about what/who was taken. An innocent child died and was thrown away like yesterday's garbage. But surely in those last moments of her little life, the Lord Jesus took her by the hand and took her to the Promised Land. He held that baby in His arms and wiped away every tear. He explained to her the purpose of her life and how her story would touch others to make them realize how truly short life is and how we must TREASURE the gifts God has given us in our children. Why God allowed such horror we will never understand. But that little girl has a purpose. Her life was not wasted and God did not take her away. The hands of another human did. Like Cain and Abel the Lord cries out at this and He shed His precious blood for her murderer and for the pain of that little girl. He, the Master, took her pain and fear upon His back. He will explain it to Caylee as only HE can.

2. Yesterday, my husband received a call from one of his bosses. A co-worker who is approximately 38-40 years old had gone to church and come home. His family had gone out shopping and his 18 year old daughter was out with friends. The 18 year old came home and found the tread mill running and her father face down beside it, dead from a heart attack. It will not matter what gifts those children and the wife have under the tree, their very lives have been turned upside down. Yet in the grief is promise because this man knew the Lord as Savior. Their is a promise and a hope that all those who loved him will see him again because one baby....came to save the world. That family is walking through the valley but surely the Lord Jesus is carrying them.

3. A friend lost her mother just a few weeks ago. As she struggles this first Christmas without her mother the only wish she has is that she could have more time with her mother. She too has the hope of all Christians. However, that does not take away the pain. It does not take away the grief. Yet because one little baby, came to us, the King of Kings, Lord of Lord to bring "peace on earth and goodwill toward men" she can rest in the promises of her Savior to help her walk through the grief.

So as I ponder on these things it has me wondering about Mary. She KNEW what the angel Gabriel told her about the child conceived in her womb. She KNEW that this child was the Messiah. She faced ridicule and shame of others who did not believe her story. Joseph could have had her put away in the least. However, in that day adultery was a stoning offense. She would have been considered and adulteress because she was betrothed to Joseph. But because he listened to what he was told by the Lord's messenger he willingly took her as his wife and this child as his son. As Mary gazed into the face of her newborn son, she saw God's face. She held the Savior of the world lovingly as only a mother can. And she knew, she may not have fully understood but she knew. Had it not been for that lowly, humble birth, Jesus could not have said He understood our plight. He WILLINGLY chose to humble Himself for the sins of a world who did not care about God or anyone else for that matter. Jesus.....HE IS the true meaning of Christmas. He is the ONLY meaning of Christmas.

The tinsel, the presents, the pretty lights, and all those baked goods are nice. I am thankful we have that. Gathering with loved ones is beyond priceless. However, when we come together we need to celebrate JESUS. The ONE, the ONLY reason for Christmas. Our Lord came down to be "with us" so that we might LIVE. That is the meaning of Christmas and I am awed by my KING. Thank you JESUS for your GIFT because it is a gift that never wears out. It never gets old. It can't be purchased or sold. It can't be returned for a different gift. It is free for the taking to whosoever will come.

My God, my King, My Savior I adore you and I praise You for everything in my life. Apart from you I am nothing and can do nothing. YOU ARE MY REASON or everything.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Aunt Theresa and Hannah

For those of you who don't know...I am an identical twin. So the picture you see here is not of me and Hannah but of my sister and Hannah. Theresa came over to play with Hannah while Jennifer was napping and Christopher was at an after school activity. It made Hannah's day. It always astounds me how the simplest things please our children.

They do not need fancy presents and entertainment. All they really need and want from those who love them is a little time, a little listening and a little understanding. So here they are having a grand time playing with Hannah's littlest pet shop toys. The fact Theresa used your silly voices to make the little critters talk made it all the more special. I don't know if Theresa would be thrilled I put a picture up of her in a toboggan but:

Littlest pet shop toy: $14.00
time spent playing: 60 minutes
the joy she gave my Hannah: priceless.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Wordless Wednesday...well somewhat wordless

My dear little daughter deciding to throw a tantrum during Daddy's sermon cause I would not let her help. I had to go to a back room. LOL

Monday, December 15, 2008

Chocolate Snow Flake Cookies......toddler style

Chocolate Snowflake Cookies
Toddler Style

Prep time: 1 hour 30 min (ready in 2 hours 30 minutes)

Kitchen tip: To make snowflake holes with clean edges, hold the straw vertically and twist it slightly to make the openings.

1 cup sugar 2 ¾ cups all purpose flour
1 cup margarine or butter ½ cup unsweetened cocoa
softened ¾ teaspoon baking powder
¼ cup milk ¼ teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon vanilla drinking straw
1 egg 2 tablespoons powdered sugar (uh I used WAY MORE)

1. In large bowl, combine sugar and margarine; beat until light and fluffy. Add milk, vanilla and egg; blend well. Add flour, cocoa, baking powder and baking soda; mix well. Cover with plastic wrap; refrigerate 1 hour for easier handling. (be sure to take pictures of your flour and chocolate covered toddler who was helping you mix and who also tasted the dough).
2. Heat oven to 350 degrees F. On lightly floured surface, roll out 1/3 of dough at a time to 1/8 inch thickness. (Keep remaining dough refrigerated). Cut with floured 2 ½ inch star shaped cookie cutter. Using drinking straw, punch random holes in cutout stars. (mine were not so random cause it was easier since a 2 year old was helping). Place 2 inches apart on un-greased cookie sheets. (Be sure to keep telling your 2 year old NOT to touch the cookies).
3. Bake at 350 degrees F. for 8 to 11 minutes or until set. Immediately remove from cookie sheets. Cool 15 minutes or until completely cooled. Sprinkle with powdered sugar. (Be sure to get kisses from your powdered sugar covered toddler who is “helping” you sprinkle. Allow child to have at least one cookie before dinner since she helped so well.)
4. Remind you toddler that she can NOT lick the cookies because you are trying to make them as a gift.
5. Remove LICKED cookies and put them with family batch to keep. After all one can not send one’s buddy pre-licked cookies.
6. Have fun and eat them with lots of love and laughter.
7. Package cookies meant for gift after cooled and sprinkled in ziplock bag.
8. Hide bag from toddler because she wants ALL the cookies.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Only one of MY kids........(edited to add photos)

Okay is there a sign on me that says

Let Bizarre things happen to her children

We went out to play in the snow. About 1.5 inches...........not much but enough for a snow day only because the roads were frozen over with ice.

We came back in after 20-30 min....cause the kids were cold. We shed out shoes, socks and jackets. I had been in maybe 4-5 minutes and Hannah comes up to me and says look mama

Her feet and ankles were swollen and had HUGE hives....I mean HUGE! I called the nurse....and by the time they called back.(it takes them FOREVER to call back)..it had faded.....so nothing we can do. BUT allergic to cold? Who knew?

Like my son having sensory issues but now it ONLY effects his eating as he has gotten past the tactile issues. Yeah......strange but that is just the way it is.

oh and both the nurse and my mil asked

Did you put socks on them or just shoes?

UH DUH! IT was 27 degrees outside.......what do you think? duh! Of course I put socks on THEM.....HELLO.

but my in-laws are taking us to buy boots today and mittens..since we don't have any.......that is a blessing.......

Here is one photo....the white in the center of the red is all hive......and the ankle is swollen:


photo number 2:

you can see how swollen around the ankle bone it is. I have very petite, bony children...LOL. Usually.


more of the hives:

It looked much worse in person than these photos show.

I dont get it..........but then again.......it made for an interesting morning. And something I am going to have to discuss more in depth with the dr. I am keeping the photos to show the dr. So they will not think it is a figament of my imagination.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Dear Amy.....I must need remedial classes in comptuer technology

Ah Dear Amy over at the Monster Wrangler blog. I can not seem to access your blog. I have clicked your name, your blog and even googled for your blog. Alas, I can not get there as it keeps telling me the link is broken. I being not so technical savy do not know how to remedy the situation. You faithfully read my blog and I can not return the favor. Which brings to mind other things I do not know how to do in the land of blog land.

I can NOT make html code for eye popping backgrounds.

I can NOT seem to figure out how to use labels for my posts to attract readers.

I can NOT seem to figure out how to add gadgets appropriately.

I just now learned how to EDIT for spelling errors, which makes my blog more readable.

I just now learned not to write everything in 1 continuous paragraph. (You'd think I'd know that seeing as how English and such was my finest subject in school).

I can NOT get my pictures to post in the order I wish when uploading to blogger. It all pops up random.

So this technical misfit needs "Blogging for Dummies".

Ahh...but the joys found through writing in my blog are there despite my inept abilities with the computer.

At this rate Christopher and Hannah will be much more techno savy then me in just a couple of years, if they aren't already.

Pink Elephants in my kitchen

I am trying to commit, as much as possible with 3 kids needing attention; my first hours of the day to God. Seeing as how my brain is still stuck in neutral and on idle, it is not easy. Sleep deprivation tends to have me thinking pink elephants might really exist. Only my elephants are in the kitchen eating breakfast and have lots of needs. They need to get dressed, have teeth brushed, a diaper/pull up changed, a ride to school and much much more. I once said while attending Bible College that I was "sluffering" having lost the ability of speech after pulling an all-nighter to study for an exam and finish a term paper. Sluffering is the combination of the words suffering and sleep deprivation. It is a direct indication of just how much the lack of sleep has attacked you. Now, then, I only THOUGHT I knew what sleep deprivation was. Little did I know at the time.....that would seem like a minute lack of sleep in comparison to what I experienced after becoming a mom.

The pink elephants are calling again. One needs to potty, one needs his hair combed and one is dawdling at getting dressed. ......Now what was I saying.....

Oh, my brain desperately cries out for more quiet time with God. However, if I do actually get quiet time, chances are it will turn into naptime.......zzzzzzzzzzz.

Okay, I'm awake, I'm awake...sort of.

Dear Lord: Please be patient with me.

I am trying. I just have to take care of my pink elephants...although my son would not like being called pink......guess he will have to be my blue elephant. Once I get them taken care of I might actually be able
to "Be still and know that He is God". I know He is God but I mean......coming into commune with Him and knowing Him in His presence on a daily basis. But He is always here for me, even when my conversation with Him comes in disjointed starts and stops.

Well off to take 2 of my wee little elephants to school and hopefully the other elephant and I will be able to go to the grocery store and pick up some items. But that is dependent upon what Papa elephant says is in the bank account.

In the meantime, I am relying on the fact that He understands I am an unfinished work, someone who needs to grow in Him. His promise:

"The Lord will perfect that which concerns me; Your mercy, O Lord, endures forever, Do not forsake the works of Your hands." Psalm 138:8

In other words He is perfecting me. He understand me and His hands are working in my life. He sees my heart and my desire to have some time with Him.

Okay........the pink elephants and the blue one too are running amuck.....sigh

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Raise Your Hand

Come on raise your hand if you aren't the hallmark looking mom, the mom in the commercials...that perfect mom.........

Come on raise your hand

If sometimes being a Mom doesn't feel fun.
If sometimes you are so close to losing it you feel like a volcano about to erupt.
If sometimes you love your children but you don't like them very much cause all they do is fight. (okay I like them but not their behavior).
If sometimes you feel like the meanest mommy on the block.
If you wish you could escape for a weekend by yourself.....or even a potty time without company.
If thinking these thoughts gives you great guilt.
If you wanna do better but you blow it at least a few times a weak.
If you regret things you have said and have to apologize to your children.
If there are times you did not apologize and should have.
If sometimes you feel like a failure.
Raise you hand:

If you'd do it all over again in a heartbeat!
If you wouldn't trade the hard times for all the money in the world.
If you know this too shall pass.
If you know that mistakes are a part of motherhood.
If you know you can make a difference and erase mistakes if you admit them and work to do better.
If you know its okay to leave the dishes in the sink to dance with your toddler or color with you kids.
If weeping comes at night but joy comes in the morning.
If you know God is on your side even when it feels you are all alone.
If you know it isn't your strength but His strength that helps you soar.

I am hiding

I had a whole post I was going to write but have changed my mind because I do not think I can protect the innocent or keep the names and identity of those being unfair from being guessed. I have some readers that know far too much about family members that need to not know the family's dirty laundry. (Both immediate and not immediate family)

In airing the dirty laundry, I would "feel" better. I would get some sort of vindication/revenge/joy out of sticking it to the ones who have made me feel inadequate and as less than acceptable. What would I really win though? A fleeting feeling of joy that comes from the release of the vent.

I WANT to kick and scream and throw a tantrum.
I WANT to rant and rave and give some people what for in no uncertain terms.
I WANT to stick it to someone and let them feel what I feel for just ONE day.

what I will do is


I am hurt, I am angry and I feel like I never measure up. Yet to my Father in heaven, I am HIS child and HE will ALWAYS love me, warts and all.

I try to keep my warts, my ugliness and my need to get even hidden. But every once in a while, it creeps in. It threatens to strangle me. I am human despite the belief of some that I should always have it together and never get angry or upset. Despite the fact, I am supposedly super human I do have the need to whine on occasion or blow of some pent up steam.

Why is it not acceptable for a Mom to ever need a break? Why is it not acceptable to WANT some "me time". That is seen as selfish because a real wife and mom does not need that. A real wife and mom does not need to do anything but keep her family fed, house perfect and all in order.

No, I do not cast the blame for this feeling all on the strong shoulders of my husband cause the attitude comes for the most part outside this home. Yet it effects us. It effects the glasses through which my husband does view the world.

It does not come from just one place. The need for me to fit a certain criteria comes from many places. The roles I am supposed to be able to fill, today, feels impossible.

I am one woman, I can not do it all. I have feelings. Because I do not do things the way someone else might, does not make it wrong. I am tired and no one gets that.

In Psalm 27:5 it says "In the time of trouble He shall hide me in His pavilion; in the secret of His tabernacle shall He hide me".

Today I need to hide. I need to hide from the stress and the expectations that are impossible to meet. This may not be the exact trouble referred to in this verse. But my Father promised to take care of me. He did NOT promise my life would be easy. But He did promise to be HERE for me when I need Him. That being said......I have to go into the pavilion. I have to choose to go to HIM so HE can hide me. I can not stand outside the gates of the secret place expecting to be hidden when I will not even go in the door. So, it takes me trusting Him enough to walk in the door of the pavilion and letting HIM hide me. He is not going to pick me up and force me to take the gifts He is giving me for my comfort.

Some days my life is overwhelming and I can't seem to hold on. On those days.......I need to rely on HIM more. Some days, I am floating high and free. On those days......I still need to rely on HIM to be the wind beneath my wings.

So today.........I am choosing to HIDE.........hide in my Savior's love and comfort because I need HIM to cover me like the mother hen covers her chicks. Cause the storms are brewing yet again and I am to tired to face it alone.

Off to hide in the pavilion and surround myself with a blanket of prayer.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Our weekend Getting ready for Christmas

Since the girls are better and everyone was well, we went and had our annual santa picture done. This started a long time ago but especially once Mike worked for Walgreen's. Although we put emphasis on celebration of the Savior's birth, we do get our annual santa picture. Looking at the ones from the past, well it brings back so many memories. Our children have grown and not just in size. They have grown in faith and wisdom as well.

After that we did some errands, grocery shopping and running around. Then we came home and put up the decorations on our tree. It only had lights on it because the girls getting sick kind of put a stop to the decorating process.

Our family is ready for Christmas. The lights are hung, the decorations put on , and the Nativity Scene is in place. Christmas IS my favorite holiday. Without the birth of the Savior, there would be no story to tell. Because He had to choose to humble Himself as a baby in a manger so that He could be like us. Because He came, we have freedom.

My dream is to have one of those big manger scenes you can put up outside. I want the WORLD to know WHO we believe Christmas is about. Our small manger scene is needing an update. I am hoping that after Christmas I can find a new one on sale. I want one like I had as a child. We had a stable and all the animals were painted to look realistic. The baby was beautiful and removable. We never put the baby Jesus figuring in the manger until Christmas Eve. Then my sister and I tucked him in a kleenex so as to keep him warm. The wisemen and their camels started off across the room from the manger scene and we moved them closer.....and did not actually put them in the manger scene until just after Christmas our recognition that scripture shows.....the wisemen came later. Those memories are precious and I want to give my children those same memories.

We are trying to prepare our hearts for Christmas too. Giving thanks for our many blessings and celebrating that Jesus is the reason for the season. I have plans to have an activity each night from tonight forward that will prepare our hearts and minds for Christmas and the celebration of the King of King's birthday, the birth or our Savior and our Lord.

God is good and greatly to be praised.

Friday, December 5, 2008

TGIF photos........so glad this is over....and we are home

just a few pics......there were a couple more but blogger wouldn't cooperate so this is what I have.

They are finally feeling better and asked to eat today. They are still tired but well enough to play some. God is good.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Just Enough Grace......Indeed

Thanks Rebekah over at Sweet Tea with Lemons, I won this book by Heather Nations. The winning of this book could not have come at a better time!

Heather is a wonderful lady, who has fought the Goliath of cancer and won. Her outlook on life and strength, comes from her faith. Her blog can be found at
Red-Headed Rants and Rambles

The reason this came at such a good time because of the week I have had. As you know from my blog, the week before Thanksgiving Christopher was sick with a tummy virus. If only we had known, this was just a mere inkling of what we were about to face. He was quite ill but it was nothing compared to what my wee girls were about to be hit with.

On Sunday, after a couple of days of icky poops (for both girls) Hannah started puking. I went off to church and left my Mama with the girls so I could fulfill my nursery duties. She did NOT seem that ill at the time. Uh.......wrong! I came home to our roast in the crock pot and Hannah still being sick and not wanting to eat. She began to toss her cookies even more and could not hold down even ice chips. At 7 pm my husband and I made the decision for me to take her to the ER. She was that ill. She was not keeping anything down and becoming increasingly lethargic. Lethargic in a 5 year old is not a good thing. The ER at the children's hospital kept her for about 2 hours and gave her fluids and then released us with the regular

. keep fluids going
. follow up with dr if needed
. return if..........yadda yadda yadda.

Return.....yeah......little did I know how QUICK that return would be. I arrived home and settled Hannah on a blanket on the floor so as to be closer to a bathroom and not to wake up her sister. At about 10 pm, over the baby monitor, I hear it. a Cough and a strangling sound, yep, you guessed it, puking. Jennifer began throwing up. This continued every 10 minutes until 1 am when again we made the call something was drastically wrong and we could not wait until morning for the pediatrician. The baby was trembling when she tried to stand and could not hold her head up to throw up. Off I went back to ER a mere few hours since I had left. At the hospital they did blood work, hooked her up to an IV and gave her anti nausea meds. It took two pokes cause her veins were collapsing. Those meds did not work, she continued to toss her cookies. She did not even fight the insertion of the IV. She was admitted to the hospital. I stayed there with her until she was released on Tuesday at 6 pm. I knew Hannah was still having issues but did not know the extent of it until I arrived at my inlaws. I sat down to eat a bite of soup. Hannah began puking in earnest and had not kept anything all down. She almost fell over in the bucket she was so weak. My husband had called the dr at 2:30 pm for meds to stop her vomiting. He was told "she will be fine, just give her fluids and bring her in the morning at 10 am". Yeah......right.

So off I went BACK to the ER! Okay this is 3 trips to the ER and 1 admission now. I get to the ER, they are packed. We are placed in the over flow room and an IV is started on Hannah, blood is taken. (This was NOT done for Hannah on her previous ER trip) and meds given. She too, did not fight the IV. She cried but did not fight. She was so brave, adorably so. She was tossing her cookies while they were trying to insert it. Anyway they got it in and gave her meds. They asked me "do you want us to just tank her up and send her home or admit her". I told them I had no idea but I did not want a return trip as this was visit NUMBER 3 to the ER. I asked for what the blood work revealed.

Normal bicarbonate level in a child is apparently 18. At 15 they will keep the child in the ER and give them fluids and send them home. Hannah's level was 12! Yep 12! I said "ADMIT HER". We got an observation room and did not go to a pediatric floor like with Jennifer because there were no beds. She was released on Wednesday.

This morning, Jennifer tossed her cookies again. Quite honestly I was beyond the ability to comprehend this. I had scheduled a follow up appointment for 9:45. I pushed ice chips and sips of pedialyte and kept it down her but every time she coughed I feared it would start again. We made it to the appointment and they gave her a shot for nausea.

So we are home, the girls are weak, very weak. They are not eating but they are keeping fluids down.

So grace, yes I had enough this week to get me through each event. I had grace as tears rolled down my face on Tuesday night when I was taking Hannah back to the ER for her 2nd trip. I called friends for them to pray and they did.

I had grace when I watched my babies so weak from tossing their cookies they trembled and shook and could not stand. I had grace when I watched my girls basically completely out of it and not even waking to acknowledge vital signs and stuff being done to them. I had grace as I went through it alone because Mike needed to not only work but be with the other children. I had enough grace when sometime on Monday after being awake for some 30 plus hours I began tossing my cookies. Mike came to the hospital and sat by Jennifer's bedside and held her in the rocking chair while I slept for 2 hours. God moved and touched my body and the nausea and vomiting went away. I had grace through the many hours of little to no sleep and I had grace from my King when my dear sweet baby began tossing her cookies again this morning.

I fought the Goliath of FEAR! FEAR so pervasive my heart was racing because my children were so sick and kept being sick. They are recovering. Their weakness is hard for me to watch. But God's grace is here.

And now I will have grace to get my household back in order. Bless his heart my husband tried but he has had to work extra hours to make up for work missed on Tuesday when he had to go home to Hannah while I was at Children's with Jennifer.

So yes..........I had just enough grace to get me through the valley we were walking in. Some people have said "oh it is just a tummy virus"......yes but dehydration can KILL. And it was NOT their child who was too weak to hold up her head. It was not their baby screaming NO in terror as she felt yet another spasm of vomiting come over her. It was not their child who trembles when she walks cause she is so weak. BUT God gave me grace and we are home and my children albeit weak are on the mend. And I praise God for the days they keep me so busy I can't think. Because having them bouncing off the walls is 20 thousand times better than them being so listless and weak they can't function.

I praise God for healing and for the lessons I have learned through this. Be grateful for the little things. Be grateful when your child is well enough to get into stuff because when they aren't IT HURTS your heart in places you cant even fathom.