Thursday, May 5, 2011

Internet fast days 2&3

Yesterday was a busy day and today has been also.  I registered Jenny for kindergarten yesterday. That is so bittersweet.  You are happy on one hand your baby is growing up but on the other hand, well, your baby is growing up too fast.  She was quite happy.  Although she was none to pleased, she could not start right away. Even though we had told her, it was just registration, for some reason, she held out hope she would get to do something in Kindergarten that very day. 

I also had a great Bible devotional with myself and the Lord during my prayer watch.  He ministered to me in such a special and gentle way.  It is hard to put into words really. But He gave me some assurances that I needed.  He is good that way.  He lets you know what to work on, but He also comforts you and encourages you in what you are doing well.

I did forget a couple times and on autopilot sit down to the computer, both yesterday and today.  But I am doing pretty well with it.  Didn't realize how much time goes by while on the computer until I wasn't on the computer. I hope that makes sense. 

That being said, my house is looking and smelling good. Now as a general rule, my house isn't bad, had a lived in look and such, but isn't dirty by any means. But with 2 days of limiting computer time; I have had gotten a lot more done.  I still have a good bit of spring cleaning to do that I have never "got around to". But I will get it done.

Jenny and I were eating our sandwiches at lunch.  She did everything I did.  If I took a drink she did.  If I wiped my mouth, she did.  I sneezed and she pretended to sneeze.  She said "Mommy, I want to be just like you".  Now that is both sweet AND scary. I am glad she loves me.  But I see myself warts and all.  She sees me more like Christ sees me.  She doesn't see my faults.  She just loves me.  That is how Jesus sees us.  He loves us just as we are.  We are covered by Him and that is what the Father sees.  Us covered by Jesus. 

The scary part is that I do not want her to learn bad things from me.  I have really worked this week on not "murmuring", grumbling, complaining. I do not want to be a "child of Israel in the wilderness".  Whether I am in the wilderness or not, murmuring needs to NOT be in my vocabulary.  I have been aware, this week, just how much we let the negative sneak out.  I am trying to speak positive and :

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things. Philippians 4:8
Be what comes out of my mouth.  That scripture shouldn't be just about what we think but be about how we think and act.  This week I am working on that as a goal.  It is harder than one thinks.  We do just the opposite a little to often.  Some of us will admit it and some will not. But if we are honest with ourselves; we will realize that negative is easier to speak and think than the positive.

I want to be pleasing to my Lord.  Doing that means always having my armor on so I can stand and being like the Proverbs 31 woman.  However, if you think about it, in order for her to be that woman; she did not stay so busy she took no time to refuel. The ONLY way she could be that way was by spending time at the feet of Her Lord.  She had Martha action with a Mary heart.  She worked, she listened, she knew how to balance her time and life with the Lord.  Had she not been able to do that; she would have burned out.  Her lamp would never have been trimmed and ready.  She would have been to exhausted to keep going. For, it is only through refueling in the Lord that we can be all that He is calling us to be.  Unless we keep are armor cleaned, polished and sharpened through time with the Master, we can not fight and withstand against our enemy. 

So, I said all that to your quest to be that woman, the one He has called you to be (or the man He has called men to be.  Do not forsake sitting at the feet of the Master.  He is the one that helps you stay prepared.  Do not worry about today or tomorrow.  But be busy about the Father's business. And remember that sometimes, the Father's business, means you take time to sit and soak in His presence in order to gain from Him what you need to better serve.