Dear Children

I am your mother. I am not your slave, although you seem to think so. And no my dear 8 year old son, I did not suddenly lose brain cells recently and you do not need to explan to me how to fix dinner. I have been cooking for quite some time. My dearest Hannah you do not need to whine in order to get your way. Fact of the matter is, whining has the opposite effect on Mommies. It makes us move slower just to protect our ears and brain from the whining noise. Sweet Jennifer, yes you are working hard to learn to go potty, but could you please go without the bowl insert and just sit on the potty so mommy doesnt have to be sick.

While I am at it. Crayons, go in the crayon bucket, not under the couch cushions or in my shoes where I find them in the mornings while getting ready to take you to school. And on the subject, please brush your teeth when I ask and dont attempt to do it 2 seconds before we go out the door. Also, your prayers are very cute but they are not a way to communicate to Mommy through God that you want a particular toy. No fair using God over Mommy. God can say NO too. I love you all dearly. You have great, bright imaginative minds, please use them to do creative things instead of using them to fight creatively. Calling your brother or sister a donkey head is not cute or becoming and it is still calling names. Oh and beds do not make themselves and laundry does not get in the hamper by itself. They need your hands and your legs to help them. Free the clothes from the floor and the grime and put them in the laundry so I can wash them. One more thing......I am not a short order cook. Eat what you are given. I do not make strange unknown foods from the planet garbedly gook. I make food you know and love. So eat it or go without.

Love you.
Mommy